Healthy relationship with food? Bitch I'm a borderline I've never had a healthy relationship with anything.

I'm a disgusting, MONSTEROUS person and it shows on my body. If I was nice and likeable and friendly and not a piece of shit I could lose the weight. I clearly don't have an eating disorder at all. I clearly don't even want to be pretty the way I let myself eat. No more food. 🐷🐖🐷🐖

Mood: Tinker Bell when her light starts to go out

I had a binge so bad that I had to deactivate out of shame but I'm back

not that BMI 22 is waifish. get over yourself 💀

I always eat a lot when I'm around him, giving him the impression that I'm this mysteriously waifish boy who eats junk all the time...

We were out to eat a few weeks ago and I mentioned that I lost a lot of weight in college. He said I'm lucky because I can just "will it away."

I wanted to correct him. The words were on the tip of my tongue but I chickened out.

I think I missed my chance to tell my boyfriend I have an ed and now I have to keep it a secret forever.

I find it's a good distraction, especially if I have a few strong flavors to switch between.

Posting to stay accountable

Tonight's feast will be smoke and gum and diet coke. They gave me a full fat mocha and it was delicious but now I have no cals left. 💔

The only time I have h0mic¡dal thoughts

I usually just plan a cheesy meal but... I'd feel a lot better if I used those cals for something nutrient-dense.

Anyone have a trick to resolve cheese cravings without all the fat? Maybe broth?

Tomato soup ❤️

freequent letdown

open.spotify.com/track/5ZJfOk...

This is pretty close to how I do it. I can barely sleep if I don't have food in my stomach.

Fuckin' yeah you did. But that's fine.