Put a little funk on it, you’ll feel better.

I put my pizza oven out back, nowhere near the house, but it’s so alluring to do a pizza in three minutes and it tastes delicious

a woman in a blue scrub top is standing in front of a door with #schittscreek written on it Alt: a woman in a blue scrub top (Alexis) takes a long sliding step back to the counter and stops with a little pop-up to hear whatever’s next

Call it Pickle Month.

I’m more eager for The Great War movies. Color me intrigued.

If a person has dealt with the plumber, the exterminator, and grocery shopping all in one day, that person should not have to go to the gym.

BRING IT ALL BACK.

RETVRN. RETVRN. RETVRN.

Excellent parenting, two thumbs up, no notes 👍🏼👍🏼

Not gonna lie, I’m scared of Bean.

Me, crying: the we rate dogs account talked about astronaut Kristina Koch’s dog and how it was the furthest someone has ever been away from their dog 😭

Tilly: it was also the furthest they’ve ever been away from humans too

Me, still crying: that doesn’t matter 😭

That’s a lot of bad choices all happening at once. Choicenado.

If you love old movies, pop culture, romance, or mysteries, this is a great thread.

The first step is to make the taco meat.

The next step will be to remember to eat the taco meat.

Text meme. Black letters on a yellow background: This Mamdani thing about Government for the People sounds really cool! Hope it catches on in America.

#USA
#Mamdani
#NYC

preview of a sticker of a gray cat making an empty, big-eyed face with cracked eggs floating around it on a yellow background. the caption reads "no thoughts, brain scrampled egg"

no thoughts

brain scrampled egg

get the sticker here: mcapriglione.art

Speaking of timeline cleanse….. aaaaah.

just saw someone call Kash Patel “J Edgar Boozer” and need to lie down

Oooo thank you

it's national library week, please go ask your local public librarians for a book recommend; we need a break from the photocopier. #booksky

Doesn’t Kate Jackson still own the IP? I daydream about getting a note to her. “It’s be so timely + nostalgic - we need an Amanda out there being awesome and Lee being Lee. It’s time. Let’s do it.”

God what I wouldn’t do for a reboot of Scarecrow and Mrs. King

Ready to produce pages right NOW

Very nice!

Oh no it's Monday again! Another weekend over 😌
Wishing you all a happy week ahead, love Bonnie 🐾♥️🐶
#westie
#dogsofbluesky

Can we arrange a hashtag of pure timeline cleanse - puppies and cupcakes - 24/7 so people can get a dose whenever they need it?

We need it.

Ok I saw it. Duly horrified (and I was pretty horrified before.)

It's intense. It's OK not to want it.

We need a matriarchy run by lesbians with clipboards and earpieces who do not take any shit.

Happy Birthday George Takei, actor, activist, community leader! 🎂🎉

This is a war based on lies

"As immigrant deaths in custody grow" - perhaps, Sen. Hickenlooper, you and your fellow Senators can lead the way in telling the story as it really should be told: "As more people die inside America's borders due to the negligence of ICE..."

Accountability is needed. An overhaul isn't possible.

I'll have to look for that.
I already know it's from satan.

With this new InfoWars, we will democratize psychological torture, welcoming brutal and sadistic ideas from everyone, even the very stupidest among us. It will be like the Manhattan Project, only instead of a bomb, we will be building a website. The InfoWars of tomorrow will converge into a swirling vortex of content about content, talent acquiring talent, rings of concentric media mergers processing all human artistry into one endlessly digestible slurry. This will be a dank, sunless place, one where panic and capital feed on each other like twins in the womb of a hulking, unknowable monster—a monster known by many names, but which I like to call modern-day America.

What a beautiful piece of writing from my boss, @brycetetraeder.bsky.social.

theonion.com/at-long-last...