Jefferson County and Shelby County AL locals: It’s looking awfully ICEy off Lorna Rd in Hoover and in Pelham. Stay safe.

My nervous system is currently under the impression that I’m about to be attacked by a wild animal, so I’m going to throw it off by popping a Warhead and then faking it until
I make it.

I’m leery of going fully goblin mode on any app because then I start having people I know (and don’t want) following me.

I just saw a video of a bobcat kitten and honestly they have no business being as cute as they are.

El oh el I ran out of my house without a Zyrtec or my adhd meds so apparently we are just going to be unhinged today.

Yeah but LOOK AT HER.

i am sorry to my gen x coworkers but you have to understand i am never, under any circumstances, going to answer a teams call without a message outlining why we need to talk first

The Supreme Court: The President has full immunity now

Joe Biden: *Pardons son*

Everyone: Wait

A photo of the user holding a copy of The Tortured Poets Department Anthology vinyl album

Bag secured and back in bed with a cat perched on me. I am recognizing that downing a Celsius while in the cold however was a ✨choice✨

The photo is of the user of the account holding a black coffee mug that reads “Oh the leopards ate your face?”

Permanent mood

Show me a picture on your phone that has your energy that isn’t a selfie.

As someone who has shit taste in music and medicated depression, don’t sweat it. 😂

Got a steroid shot so that I can bust through the walls at work like the Kool Aid Man once it and my Vyvanse combined 💪🏻

Brb gonna go scream into the void

I don’t know how I got onto the part of TikTok where southern maga women fully believe that liberal women are going to jump them… ma’am we don’t care about you enough to jump you. We have other shit to do. Kthanks.

Getting started with a banger, I see

A photo of a crocheted blanket in progress on a table

I promise my posts do get more interesting, I have just been cooped up sick all weekend. Have a scrap blanket WIP for tax.

Parenting is truly wild because explain to me how I accidentally made my biggest bully? Kid took my glasses off my face and hid them in the middle of our patterned rug. Reader, I can’t see well enough to find them when they are on the rug.

Also including this is why I get every booster that comes along. Every. One.

EL OH EL I went to Eras and came home healthy but a kids birthday party got me Covid??

I wish everyone a very please don’t catch norovirus, I’m convinced it does nothing but get harder the older you get.

Listen having a 13-month-old is cool and all but no one warned me about the whole walking thing.

Cheers, Mama - here is to having kids that hopefully don’t share our (sometimes debilitating) religious trauma ✨🩷

THE NERVE. Does he know how hard you worked for those skills?!

This is not the America The Chicks wanted for us

If you see this, post a concert pic you took:

Indy Eras, Night 2

It’s pretty pleasant so far, not gonna lie.

I was talking about you, my friend!

THE QUEEN HAS ARRIVED 👑