Armageddon, you say? Well, I don’t see why not. 🙈

And a single Vienna sausage on the side.

It’s giving The Shining

Why would you make that poor man see this with his own eyes? He might have a stroke.

They basically foretold of “gooning” (go away, ‘batin)

I’m hearing that dude bros sunning their taints is a thing and I’ve never wanted to get off this timeline more, which is saying something.

I know the world is burning but I really don’t think sending all these text messages asking poor people for money seems to be helping.

Eagles trade up, choose Jihaad (Philly Inquirer)

ALERT: The Chicago Cubs have won four of seven games against the Los Angeles Dodgers, a feat we were led to believe no mortal team could accomplish in the year of our lord two thousand twenty-five.

I spent too much of my day arguing with Nazis and Maggers on the Facebook today and I feel appropriately down as a result. Shame on me. But some people on the internet were terribly uneducated about what “punk” really is, and that couldn’t abide.

I’m frequently reminded of my age because I remember when misspelling potato in front of kids was grounds for disqualification from federal office. What a fuckin world.

cc: @katienolan.bsky.social show me to the tribe plz love you mean it

Are people doing this one or Threads or what? I can’t be inundated with Trump all day (clinical depression/self/care). I want to commune with sane sports fans. I miss Twitter and hate this timeline we are stuck in and want to get off at the next time vortex. Where are my peoplllllleeee???

Missouri Tigers: Transitive property national champs 🐅

Yes but Houston accomplished the college basketball thing that matters most: giving an all-time loss to Duke

Wow. That last possession was wild. Clayton is a dawg. I’d take him over Flagg without a second thought.

So are we still using our 401ks to justify Trump votes or nah? Asking for 77 million people.

Duke perennially leads the nation in punchable faces.

Morgan Wallen and his fans have no idea there’s an entire generation of people who not only watch SNL but fast-forward through most of the musical guests.

If they sent Pitino to Providence and set him up with Calipari in the second round, he damn shol better not lose to Omaha lol

I’ve seen more Seig Heils in the last month than I ever needed in my entirely life. I’m ready to get off this ride.

Good job, Canada. We probably deserved that.

Good lord, the last minute of regulation was terrifying.

Mfs on fb selling a golf cart for 13 grand like wtf

True story: Seeing Paul McCartney play on SNL as a kid had a profound effect on me, and that man still got it.

Girl you don’t wanna talk to at a party + drunk uncle was the funniest bit yet.

Eddie Murphy as Tracy Morgan standing next to Tracy Morgan is gold lol

Ferrell*

Farrell’s Goulet and Wiig’s 7-head and baby arm in one sketch? 🥰

#SNL50 live thread:

Paul Simon is v old and it makes me sad, but Sabrina’s joke about it made me laugh. Kinda a weird arrangement here tho.