U.S. Border Patrol commander Greg Bovino needs be thrown in prison before he beats someone to death for walking down the sidewalk.

a man wearing sunglasses and a hat with the words we 're putting the band back together ALT: a man wearing sunglasses and a hat with the words we 're putting the band back together

#Astros

Hate to say it but I think is guarantees Bregman is a Yankee.

Me: adds approximately 45 books to my want-to-read list

Also me: I should read Lord of the Rings again

[Camera lovingly caresses the entire minutes-long brawl as millions of people are far too locked in to change the channel]

Gus and Joel: Nobody wants to see this

Dolly wrote “Jolene” and “I Will Always Love You” in one night.

My Life As a Homeless Man in America An extraordinary firsthand account.

This first-hand account of homelessness is one of the best things I’ve read this year.

www.esquire.com/news-politic...

Thank goodness.

Idk why my IG reels are full of nostalgic mid-aughts sports montages set to a Linger cover but yes I’m watching every single one and contemplating my mortality

One thing about the western United States is they will really just put a giant dinosaur statue outside any business for no reason and I respect the hell outta that

Kevin Durant.

How Do You Get Kids to Read? Give Them Pizza. Pizza Hut’s Book It! literacy program, founded in 1984, has reached more than 70 million students — and counts the radio host Charlamagne Tha God among its fans.

Love this about Book It! and Pizza Hut. Gift article: www.nytimes.com/2024/10/31/b...

The Onion Buys Alex Jones’s Infowars Out of Bankruptcy The satirical news site planned to turn Infowars into a parody of itself, mocking “weird internet personalities” who peddle conspiracy theories and health supplements.

Hi everyone.

The Onion, with the help of the Sandy Hook families, has purchased InfoWars.

We are planning on making it a very funny, very stupid website.

We have retained the services of some Onion and Clickhole Hall of Famers to pull this off.

I can't wait to show you what we have cooked up.

RIP Tyler White pizza party saga

I unabashedly hate the Space Cowboys name change and will die on this hill. Where are we? Clear Lake? We are poorly-drained reclaimed prison land, the mosquito is our proper mascot.

I was born a Sugar Land Skeeter and I’ll die a Sugar Land Skeeter.

When in doubt, Matt Albers.

I don’t have any information but at some point people were discussing members of Astros Twitter they missed and someone threw a “rip” next to his name. I also hope not.

Hi, I am a member of the Emil Rothe and Larry Dierker chapters, may I be added?

God grant me the serenity to accept I am cooked,

The courage to say fuck it we ball,

And the wisdom to know when we are so back

Did Alfred Tuvey really pass away or was that a joke?

Ah okay I didn’t know if it was something more than the standard deviation Arte Moreno’s Factory of Sadness takes. Carry on.

It is time for you to meet the coolest livestock judge in the world

Sorry to be out of the loop, but what is happening with the reaction? I didn’t see anything crazy on r/baseball…

Incredible.

Lol this is incredible and a good reminder that I need to get around to reading that.

Houston Astros to send two prospects to Canberra Cavalry for ABL Season 2024-25 | theABL.com.au The Australian Baseball League is the only professional baseball league in Australia, relaunched in 2010. 호주 프로야구

Attn Astros fans, looks like the Canberra Calvary is our ABL team this winter. theabl.com.au/news/astrosc...

Bring back Tal's Hill.