There's a parallel world where Luis Buñuel makes movies about being force fed and being able to come and go as you please

It’s the anniversary of Richard Nixon’s death so as I do every year I am going to get drunk and make some unpopular decisions

Making a biopic about Michael Jackson should be as easy as ABC. The views of Michael are out & they are bad. It’s hardly a thriller. It treats his life as black or white and avoids all controversy of him being an accused smooth criminal. If you will be there I suggest you avoid this film and beat it

Now former Secretary of Labo(u)r Lori Chavez-Deremer has flung herself from a window!

Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe's marriage has entered the nuptial death portal.

The time is 8:01 PM Blaire Daylight Time. The sun has just set its first post-8 PM sunset

When my dad said, son you need to make some friends who will be there with you for life, in the trying and most difficult times, and the great times, guys you can discuss anything with, I dont think he meant buddies who will be there for you to discuss RFK Jr cutting off a raccoon penis

Do you think Werner Herzog gets sick of people saying to him, how dare you doubt me, you moved a ship over a mountain

Local columnist & pain in the ass (and I mean that with the deepest respect) Joel Connelly has entered the Seattle death portal

First Hill weather report: thunder & lightning and singing about my favorite things

It's a slippery slope from feuding with Rosie O'Donnell to attacking the Pope

It’s called Low Sunday because the first autobus was two minutes early, the second (different route) was three minutes early, and the third three minutes late (and I still made it but sat in the corner)

Just because the president is fighting with the Vatican doesn’t mean he Vatishould

114 years ago today someone was like wow this cruise is GREAT

Do you think Leo is down in the catacombs spooling up the centrifuges laffing in Latin?

Well it’s Orthodox Easter. Man, it feels like it comes earlier & earlier every year

I accept this challenge

It’s called Low Sunday because the first autobus was two minutes early, the second was three minutes early, and the third three minutes late

🗳️🇭🇺 Sok szerencsét, és ne rontsd el, Magyarország! 🇭🇺🗳️

That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for MMIWG2SLGBTQQIA+kind

I will miss my moonmen and moonwoman flying about in space these last ten days

I have made many enemies in my life. I have had many more people disagree with me. But I have never pissed off two popes, let alone one.

The pope is justifiably mad at the him and he's unjustifiably mad at the pope so he has no choice but convert to Catholicism, and make himself Pope to fulfill the memes from last year

Taco taco Taco taco taco taco Taco taco

40 Days of Dent?

I give up

Helping Iran set up $2 million tariffs for the Strait of Hormuz. That’s capitalism baby!

Like the rising of the sun of in the west as it sets in the east, he will always taco

Somewhere in a nation's capital, We'll Meet Again plays on repeat in the leader's mind

Welcome back everyone who was away for Lent. I have some some amazing gossip—