Happy Birthday Chris! 🎉🎂

I'm crying all over again

Samantha Jones PR and Miss Carrie Bradshaw drinking cocktails. The subtitles read 'From the summit of Barad-Dur, his eye watches ceaselessly'

Somehow forgot about this in my tired haze but when I was watching Sex And The City 2 the other night, I turned the subtitles on and...

That's my hometown, the laws of nature have always been nebulous there

This is huge! Well done Mark!

??

There can be 100 Madame Morribles in a room, and 99 of them don't believe in running hate propaganda against you, but all it takes is just one to flip it around to turn you into a Wicked Witch

Just had to stop Fergus eating my yoga mat

You catty little witch

This was a labour of love because my pain tolerance is not what it used to be but Nightcrawler is finally done after several sessions (@tropikalcoconut on insta for this incredible work)

❤️ to get random messages from my fiancé

This was all the convincing I needed. It's giving

Absolutely thrilled to say that Aaron (@waarontear.bsky.social) finally got engaged!

He only went and made a whole RPG full of our in-jokes and references over the last 8 years, and after beating the final boss I was rewarded with this lovely proposal. Very us 🥹

Just earnestly sent a message saying 'Gold Labubu lady milkshake ducked' and I'm going to put my phone down for a while and get some air I think

Kelly Thompson's brilliant too and I'm sure she'll do it justice

He's a bit wonky but who isn't?!

Still from the simpsons with an ideal barbecue pit, under is a mess of metal and concrete. The text reads 'yeah that's one fine lookin crochet fox plushie...why doesn't mine look like that?'

Thought I'd try my hand at developing a new skill on annual leave and it's very this at the moment

Hundreds of choughs chuffing

That's a bird?

Three, I guess. Because there's also the sound an animal makes when they puff out air?

This makes your job read a *lot* more hands on than it is 😂

When I was an underage drinker I would drink just enough Frosty Jacks to pour in a 50cl Glen's vodka and use it as a mixer. I should not have made it to age 18.

Just had someone selling broadband at the door, said I didn't have a clue
'Oh does the missus sort that?'
Panicked
'No, my partner....the mister?'

An email subject line reading 'Welcome to GoPuff on Amazon'

I beg your pardon? And the day before Pride?!

Katy Perry won't see your skeets but your flop friends who can't read a room will

Wasn't that Vanessa Williams?

Screaming, crying, throwing up

The boob song is such a bop too. I put it on in the car