LITERALLY it’s very scary to actively voice the way we feel but it’s so important.
i do not have the energy to try to navigate someone’s vague mixed signals anymore. i need certainty and directnessand if they’re too uncomfortable to give that, that fucks me up.
respect yourself, the other person, and the feeling enough to be direct!! obviously that’s circumstantial but in most interpersonal relationships it’s going to relieve a lot of the anxiety.
yeah, that one knocked me for a loop last year. got bailed on unexpectedly by someone i was talking to, and my mother was actively railing on me bc my safety friend who i was sharing location with didn’t want to share contact details, and another friend tells me she just needs empathy lmao
with the mother stuff it seems as though there’s this general idea that “yeah all boomer moms are rough, see, i had it bad too!” without accounting for religious trauma, poverty, etc (which obv isn’t their problem but lmao), but i cannot stand the preachiness when my autonomy is violated 💀
thank you for the suggestion!! i’ve had divorce groups suggested to me before, but that has its own differences from what i went through in 2024, and so much of it is wrapped up in my mother as much as my partner that it doesn’t seem like a great fit - but i’ll look for smth like this! (1/2)
anyway, a little lingering post-full moon freakout as a treat. all this to say
✨🌸💖i would very much like to feel safe and genuinely cared for and having to do everything completely alone is really exhausting💖🌸✨
tired of love (again) existing, but not in any kind of language i can understand (i think people are generally too cowardly to be clear). it’s so fuckin’ stupid but the most i fantasize about anymore is being held by someone who doesn’t get scared or frustrated when i inevitably freak out.
person living with their parents and going through that tension on a decently normal and privileged level trying to relate to the abuse and control i grew up with and dealt with last year, saying i’m the one who should “empathize.”
i don’t understand why people are so eager to equate what i’m going through with w/e they have going on. person with a husband and a man she’s cheating on him with (and isn’t doing anything about either) giving me stock answers and agreeing with me as i crash out about love existing, but not for me.
burnout is so fun.
cptsd has been raging this week, caught btwn “time to violently mourn the full decade you’ve wasted bc you can’t amount to shit” & “the number of safe & self-aware people in your life who don’t take your pain personally is dwindling by the day bc nobody wants to deal with it” 🥳
idk but pete wentz as hamlet and mikey way as horatio would have popped tf off tho
playlist bang the doldrums - fall out boy my moon my man - feist twin skeletons (hotel in nyc) - fall out boy helena - my chemical romance smart guy season one theme lost in devotion- carly rae jepsen
your type - carly rae jepsen talk - hozier that green gentleman - panic! at the disco wine red - the hush sound momentum - the hush sound the (shipped) gold standard - fall out boy
jk but i did break my “no more than 2 tracks by the same artist” loose guideline
out here trying to make a horatio (x hamlet) playlist and oops now it’s all infinity on high tracks
i just think it’s funny that dougie jones has no records of existence until 1997, 5 years from cooper’s disappearance into the lodge, & we also know that an original s3 was going to include a timeskip of at ~5 yrs.
idk anyway point no. 2 of my “dougie jones is an og twin peaks s3 relic” conspiracy
there was water!! the only thing i can really point to is not eating at the bar, but i had a large full meal before rehearsal, and i wasn’t even warm, let alone tipsy! maybe i’m allergic to the specific type of pear and apple the cider was made from.
aging is stupid lmao
we went to a cute cocktail bar after rehearsal for one of the cast’s birthday AND I GUESS I JUST CANT FUCKIN HANG ANYMORE WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
WHY AM I PUKING AFTER 1.25 CIDERS
horatio when hamlet and ophelia sit right next to him during the “country matters” bit because space is tiny
Hath seal'd thee for herself. Give me that man That is not passion's slave, and I will wear him In my heart's core, ay, in my heart of heart, As I do thee. Something too much of this.
like imagine the prince you’ve traveled months to see and comfort in his grief saying this to you after you know he’s been going through it
and then making you sit through a farce of a play while he jokes to his other situationship about cunnilingus
hamlet’s “give me a man that is not passion’s slave” speech aka what horatio’s situationship told him less than an hour before trying to fuck another person in public.
a white nonbinary person has dark silver short hair and bold black glasses. they wear an amber beaded necklace. their makeup is vivid and green and sparkly with dark eyeshadow rimming their eyes in shades of green and peach, and their lipstick is a glossy gradient of dark red.
a white nonbinary person has dark silver short hair and bold black glasses. they wear an amber beaded necklace. their makeup is vivid and green and sparkly with dark eyeshadow rimming their eyes in shades of green and peach, and their lipstick is a glossy gradient of dark red.
insufferable bc my makeup looked amazing today
thank you!! the green blending into the blush had me like 🧐 but it worked out wonderfully.
a white nonbinary person has dark silver short hair and bold black glasses. they wear an amber beaded necklace. their makeup is vivid and green and sparkly with dark eyeshadow rimming their eyes in shades of green and peach, and their lipstick is a glossy gradient of dark red.
a white nonbinary person has dark silver short hair and bold black glasses. they wear an amber beaded necklace. their makeup is vivid and green and sparkly with dark eyeshadow rimming their eyes in shades of green and peach, and their lipstick is a glossy gradient of dark red.
insufferable bc my makeup looked amazing today
i cannot pull off a high waist but that pink and mustard like oh my GOD
I’M RIGHT AND I’M GONNA SAY IT
we really just don’t talk about dr. jacoby as an enby fashion icon enough.
i love the part of twin peaks where windom earle wakes up leo with the pokeflute.
my copy of rhetoric & poetics is highlighted all to hell by whoever sent it to thriftbooks, so as i’m also highlighting and annotating in a different color, it feels like we’re in conversation 🥲
🪐🏃🚫
do yall ever just read the medical tidbits in astrology books and then it hits you that saturn is the reason you get shin splints???
bc of course he is, it’s certainly not my lack of proper form or warming up or anything. it’s that space fucker.