I hate the word "congrats." Wow, thanks for not bothering to spell out or pronounce one whole word.

One fun aspect of having an actual insane person as president is hearing newscasters saying swear words. (I don't recall Dan Rather ever using "fuck" on The CBS Evening News.)

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. And sharks in your bedroom. Maybe that second thing was in a dream? Either way, yikes.

Remember a few years ago, during the height of the pandemic, when people would wear masks while talking into microphones??? That was INSANE!

I have been following politics for several decades and never before have I seen a US presidential administration with so many cucks.

Stop using "video" as a verb. "I videoed the wedding." No, you recorded videos of the wedding.

Stop searching for things on the internet and just go read a book. There are literally dozens to choose from. Possibly more.

Using AI to make "art" is offensive and immoral. That's not art. It's slop. Art requires human emotion behind it. There is joy and satisfaction in creativity. It makes life worth living. Otherwise, you're just waiting to die.

I don't understand people who do not own a TV. How do they watch the first four Police Academy movies???

An OnlyFans model told me I look younger than my age, so I'll be riding that high for a few days.

I think it's time for someone to make a Dracula movie that takes place in the bleak, dreadful land of Pennsylvania.

Do you find it horrifying that RFK Jr has a podcast? Are you looking for a podcast hosted by two guys who do not sound like they ran their vocal cords through a cheese grater? Then listen to WNOD!

www.wnodpodcast.com

I love the band Boston, but some of their song lyrics are too meta. “Well, we were just another band out of Boston, on the road and tryin' to make ends meet.” Wow, so you’re just describing what a rock band is? Great.

There are two types of office workers: people who needlessly use ALL CAPS in their folder names, and sane people.

You don't look your age. No, you look much older than your age.

Saying "there is nothing to watch on TV" with almost every movie and TV show ever made available to us??? That’s a skill issue.

Oh dear.

I was heating up a microwave meal at work and the package read "heat to internal temperature of 165 degrees." What?? Sorry, I must have misplaced my work food thermometer because I work in an office.

I am trying to be less self-deprecating. As expected, it's not going very well.

Occasionally I will meet a person and quickly realize that at no point in their life has anyone told them to not be such a shmuck.

One reason why I've been married for over 20 years is that I am consistent and dependable. My wife always knows where she can find me: at work, at home at my computer desk), in my car, or at a donut shop.

No one's sex life has been improved by hosting a podcast.

www.wnodpodcast.com

I got my deep voice from my chain-smoking Jewish grandmother.

I wish I cared about anything other other than video games and titties, but I do not.

"I can't stop laughing!" You should see a mental health professional about that immediately.

When Stevie Wonder sang "Isn't she lovely?" that was not a rhetorical question.

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You know what would fix climate change? The fall of human civilization. Fingers crossed!

As a guy who has been shaving his head for many years, I love talking to other shaved head guys. I ask them questions like "Which aftershave do you use?" and "What type of razor do you use?" and… well, that's all. Just those two questions.