You can't beat a good ducking.

Chocolate. You can't eat chocolate without chewing. Therefore chewing is good.

He's kicking Santa's face now.

I got my first account at 12. It was a Natwest account which came with a Solo card. I spent way too much online and went overdrawn, since this was before immediate payment authorisation. I paid it off before my mum noticed but she had to kick off to get them to remove the charges.

a man is holding a yellow ball in front of another man who says not yet ALT: a man is holding a yellow ball in front of another man who says not yet

Just fake an allergic reaction.

They should stop telling them to buy aubergines altogether. Horrid things.

I moved out at 18 and lived alone. I was fine for a few years until I moved in with my partner. Now I keep the lights on if I'm home alone. If I can see an intruder I have a better chance of defending myself.

No. I think average speed check are a better option. Don't get me wrong, I hate them too, but it encourages a lower speed over a greater distance.

They're not when it's a 30mph road.

It's about as cringey as saying "touch base". I don't want to touch anyone's base apart from my partner's.

My stepmum died on the toilet. My Dad moved her so she wasn't in such an undignified position when the ambulance came.

Nobody likes a snitch.

I think we're talking about two different scenarios. Parents who genuinely try and can't calm down their child - absolutely understandable and I can sympathise. Parents who just check out and let their child scream and do what they want on a plane, then someone has to tell them to shut up.

What makes you feel it's OK for a parent to sit idly by when their child is ruining the flight for everyone else?

To be fair it's usually because they run in front of a vehicle. Hit a baby deer on take off once.

Why should innocent passengers suffer because your child is a menace? If they're screaming and making it unpleasant for others it's well within my rights to tell them to stop being an annoying brat.

I'd eat carp happily, but I draw the line at killing it myself. I only kill things accidentally.

I was an extra once. Pay was crap, hours were long and the costume was uncomfortable and smelly. Not something I'd do again, but it was an interesting experience.

I've done 96 today. Mostly going from my desk to the kitchen. Sometimes to the lounge to check the dog is OK.

My father was a fireman in the 90s. I had it drilled into me from a very young age that chip pans are the most dangerous thing people have in the house and to never put water on an oil fire. Needless to say I was terrified of house fires for a long time. Then I got a job doing pyrotechnics.

I drank in a flat roof council estate pub once when visiting friends. Had a cracking night, the landlord locked the door and we were dancing around on tables to heavy metal.

Wait, it's not exclusively for gay Christian men? I genuinely never knew that.

My Kenwood dishwasher came with the house. We've lived here 13 years, and it must be a few years older than that. Never had to repair it once.

I fully support this. It's my mission in life to collect all vehicle licences, including the H (tank licence). Got a few road vehicle licenced, pilot licence and have a powerboat course booked. I like driving things.

A 24/7 D/s relationship is much easier. Less planning, more fun.

I removed myself when I was younger because I was terrified of dying young and wanted to be cryonically frozen. I think it's time to rejoin.

It's hard to say anything in a gimp mask but the communication beforehand is healthy.

I like the stainless steel ones. It's easy to work out the codes as finger grease frequently leaves a mark on the buttons. I don't do anything sinister but I like trying the code just to satisfy my curiosity.

The parents did it

Incy Wincy Spider
Climbed up the water spout
Got squished on the floor
Then shat on and flushed down