I do genuinely think that my spirit animal is the human. Easily the animal that I relate to the most.

Yeah it's fantastic.

various shit is constantly ebbing and flowing

look man ive got a lot of sympathy for you but you cant blame the haunted amulet your estranged grandfather left you in his will for all your problems

Absolutely. I should probably be in the credits.

I'm probably in the .0001% of Madame Web viewers worldwide. I've seen it at least 6 times.

(Tweet from 2022 with 150k likes) why are you as a man calling a frog on the toad phone?

If you're not sure who in your friend group is getting called on the toad phone, it's you. You're also a frog.

Black duds #blackduds

Just got some new duds #newduds

No you don't understand, they have a history of lying to me sometimes.

I'm like 70% sure that my friend The Sneakiest Liar is exaggerating in his claim the he "had sex with the biggest butt in the whole world."

Weak pathetic traitors are amongst the best guys to have in your corner

Crab Man Breaks Silence On Abortion Debate:

"Are we 100% sure that abortion is real? Like has anyone actually seen one? I'm not sure."

Don't think I ever even cracked a smile there.

No it is a Horse

Horse

Well here's something I was just working on recently

for too long male manipulators have gaslit women with mental health disorders as their primary targets. my start-up, physic-ally, aims to change this. we want to provide resources to male manipulators so they can gaslight women with physical disabilities as well, to create a more equitable world

I have more...

Grinnin' Fool by Mr. Smile and the Smirky Boys

My phone sent me a notification saying happy birthday today. It is not my birthday and I absolutely never told it that it was. I think my phone might think I'm hitler which feels unfounded.

You know ball.

City Rush 3 is still the GOAT but I recommend 4 as well. I love George Tounas so much.

we didnt ohrder pitsa

This is my first time watching 1 and 2, what important films.

City Rush

City Rush 2

City Rush 3

City Rush 4

Doing a City Rush Marathon tonight, now watching:

Shelling Crab Man and donating his shell and dancing around the lab with his no-shell body and telling the other forensic scientists that I'm like Dexter from the TV show Dexter

Donating my body to Dexter from the TV show Dexter before I die.

Donating my body to history when I die.