hitman: who am I killing?

dog: ever hear of a guy named pavlov?

hitman: rings a bell

dog: *narrows eyes* that's right

I am the most beautiful passenger in the trolley problem

tweet from @dimdenEFF: bypasses rate limit btw [link to a google chrome extension that bypasses twitter's rate limit] --- reply from @SeenByKori: why does this load like 20 times faster than the current twitter layout --- reply from @dimdenEFF: im a better programmer than entire twitter website department

the rate limit was defeated by a programmer with an anime profile picture

you must answer his riddles to enter the garden

a fake email from bluesky telling me to turn around

oh god oh fuck

I'm sincereposting. I'm cringemaxxing. nicepilled. going sweetie mode. friendcore

“there’s an app for that” should there be though

can’t believe my stupid ass has imposter syndrome while elon musk is confidently marching around twitter HQ and chewing on wires until something breaks

Have a good evening.cat

🐈Have a good evening 🐾 Meow🌗

khajiit has wares, if you have coin

with LGBT+ you get to be gay without any of the ads

President Biden Should Pardon The Orcas

sorry for not posting. i turned into a worm and i didn't think you all would still love me

how are you going to name your magazine after one of the top oceans and then publish this

Frog and Toad

happy pride month to them <3

she’s mastered it

she’s everything and she knows it

she’s a model

ふぁ～🥱 晴れたにゃん🐾
今日は暑くなりそうね😼✨

The sun is out today.
It's going to be hot today.🐈Meow🐾

It's so stupid that I have to do little jobs and things until I die