oh you know they SHITTIN shittin

many a time have i looked at someone in the middle of a crash-out, sometimes At me, and thought to myself “you’re not crazier than me you just have worse organizational skills”

i think daredevil and the punisher should kiss

crassula ‘dorothy’, a very cube-like little plant

crassula ‘pangolin’, a trailing plant with rough sandpaper-y leaves, in a little turtle pot

crassula ‘spiralis’, a very small plant whose leaves grow upward in a spiraling column

a bunch of subspecies of crassula ovata all together in a planter made out of some kind of briefcase or small chest

i love crassulas because there’s a thousand different kinds and every single one is insane

“you will feel a deep sense of fulfillment”

amazing how consistently they trip all over themselves in pursuit of finding the smallest, least inconvenient way to signal dissent they can possibly think of. really actually impressive

eating from a big bag of fortune cookies until i get one that doesn’t make me go “oh come on”

“your body is a temple” wrong. my body is a traveling carnival and it’s only here for a limited time

i used to live near an el pollo loco where the Ls in pollo were burnt out. el poo loco

a wall someone wrote "silly girls live forever"

that's my story and I'm sticking to it

(waggling eyebrows flirtatiously) it always does the way i do it, baby

“something went wrong” fuck yeah it did buddy

physically throwing them, i imagine. like a shotput

incredible combination btw

"Punch a nazi"

Anti-nazi sticker spotted in Oakland, California

RIP soldier

man you are gonna survive the hell out of that

Riot, a cattle dog, is carrying a comically large toy football and a dog blankie in her mouth (both pictures)

these are my awards, mother. from army

by the way if you are reading this and thinking “that exists and it’s called ______” for the love of god say something to a woman

i am very much not versed in drag culture but i really hope there’s a queen out there whose whole deal is like, overwrought ultra-campy trailer trash hick shtick. it would be so delightful

hey quick question: what the fuck

We didn't deserve this day.

wish i was in an enclosure lovingly created to mimic my natural environment

“this is just a distraction” okay well im pretty fucking distracted bro

yeah man i'll circle back to you on that agenda item from yesterday's all hands in just a sec. our pedophile king just threatened to destroy a whole civilization

Armageddon is terrible, but our only other option was diversity trainings at work.

i am done with Self Care It is time for Others Harm an animorphs style photo of a blond girl turning into a cheetah

godzilla is probably just freaking out cause people keep pointing at his nude body and screaming

why are you, as a man, oozing