Keir Starmer being crucified outside number 10

Sir Keir addresses nation outside Downing Street: "Look what you cunts have done to me."

I think at this point it’s worth remembering that we are not even 2 years in to the first Labour government in 14 years, with nearly 2/3rds of all MPs being from the party of that government. It could have been so easy, but the extent to which they have comprehensively fucked it is just staggering

Learning the hard way that you have to build up to spudmaxxing.

I am so excited to see this cube of nothing lose his seat to Leanne Mohammed.

Tim Allan, who just quit as Starmer's director of comms, was on the board of the trans-eliminationist hate group "Sex Matters", whose director of advocacy Helen Joyce urged transphobes to get through to "decision makers" so that the "numbers" of trans people could be "reduced." That's what they did.

People have worn out "performative." We often perform things that are real, you know. Posting is a kind of performance of one's politics. Performative doesn't actually mean "fake" or "empty," it just gets deployed that way. We actually need performance. Case in point: last night's performance.

The story of the weekend looks like about 3000+ people protesting asylum, 2000+ counterprotestors while 210k people do parkrun

Have they tried doing good changes that people will like and approve of

Hard to explain how utterly Jokerising it is to live in a country where MPs and press regularly unite to scream at the public about ducks actually being orangutans and then seven years later - when the damage is long since irreparable - release books called Quack! My Life Amongst The Water Fowl.

The US is a divorced man who's drunkenly come to the conclusion that the only way he can reclaim his dignity is by smashing up his ex-wife's plant pots with a screwdriver.

I know utility bills and the price of food and rent are extortionate. I know you can't afford to live any more. But don't worry because Sir Keir's buying more bombs.

Headline from French journal l'Humanité, reporting on the death of Jean-Marie Le Pen: "La Haine était son métier" (in English, "Hatred was his job").

This is how it's done, @jonhenley.bsky.social @theguardian.com 1/3

I'd just read that & wondered what your take would be. Not disappointed!

UK Government is to indefinitely ban puberty blockers for u18s.

Fuck, and I repeat FUCK labour, FUCK Wes cunting streeting, and FUCK Starmer

The death of kids will be on your heads.

#ProtectTransYouth #LGBwithTheT

Oh Dunty.

Sir Keir has lost the Donkeys! It's official: he has to go!

Word of advice: do NOT buy Christmas cards off this guy. I did (5 boxes) and they all featured Wallace eating smegma off of a cream cracker. That's not a good look for Christmas.

I will never get over the shame of having to post on a platform where I have less than 1,000 followers. It's a humiliation that reminds me of when Keith Chegwin stole the Naked Jungle gig from me.

What's your favourite traditional Israeli food? Mine would have to be pizza.

Having breakfast at the Harvester when a naked Gregg leaps on my table, hand behind his head, windmilling his cock.

Is everyone really excited about wicked or is it a joke

"We had an election a few months ago. Now I'm the daddy. And right now daddy's speaking." Sir Keir silences critics in heroic press conference outside Downing Street.

FACT OF THE DAY: 94% of straight men will only go down on a woman if she's covered her fanny in low-grade lager.

Starmer declares war on welfare, of course he does. I stated Labour was an I'm alright jack vote, that only suits liberals who want to ignore the plight of all.

Business first, people last. Capitalism = ableism

Our society is ableist to the core. If we aren't deemed productive,we die.

TFW the officer is asking you to come down to the station to explain how the images of topless teens got on your phone.

A depressed man says "well there goes the last of the dopamine." He sits on the coutch and says "maybe if I watch all my favourite TV shows again I can get it back." Months pass. His beard grow steadily. After finishing, he now has a ZZ Top beard. "It didn't work," he says.

Elon Musk’s ‘1984’