I can either disappoint you traditionally or we can develop a customized plan that fits your needs

2025 update so far: Still garbage.

the audacity of trying to rapture me without offering up garlic bread

Your honor, let the record show that im just a big titted bimbo

A moment of silence for how pretty I used to be

The internet was better when the modem screamed.

I don’t hate all men.
80 /20 rule

your friends like your posts on social media, my friends disapprove of my comments in real life, we’re not the same
or whatever

when I get lost in butthole Bluesky I don’t want to be found

When is shame month

But he gave you a <3 before he unfunnied your funny 😂

I hate the sound of Teslas too

My neighbour wave is as fake as my telephone voice

Welcome to fuckface club, fuckface.

I hate when I sneeze while I’m driving and go off a cliff.

I don’t mean to brag but I’ve been described as a liability.

come to bluesky, we have the most boomer-ass gif selection

I need a check engine light for my body, that I will also ignore.

Kiss me until we taste the same.

‘How do you know each other?’

We went to the same Twitter.

I’m sorry for having this sparkling personality and these glorious tits; I didn’t ask to be born this way.

I regret to inform everyone that I’ve decided to once again be chaotic online

Freezing our asses off.

When a women tells me her name, I always follow up with, "Oh, like the cheese?" no matter what her name is.

damn bluesky still hasnt got rid of the glitch where my posts are bad

Getting old is not for weak ass bitches. Be strong y’all.