The Infowars news is funny, yes. But more importantly, it is an outright rebuke of Alex Jones' evil.

It's testament to the strength and resilience of the Sandy Hook families who survived this bullshit for more than a decade as well as the Onion, which didn't give up on this for the last 18 months.

With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.

We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.

Please stand by for more.

Capitalism.

In the same manifesto, Palantir's owners argued that we need a national military draft, that soft power is over, and that we were too hard on Germany and Japan after World War II. I don't think that company should be allowed to exist anymore.

That's true

Oh it turns out that vanquishing the college student who uses they/them in their email signature is not bringing you the fulfillment that you hoped for? You are still working in your crappy and unfulfilling job, paying a mortgage you now can't afford, and dealing with your annoying kids... I see.

The thumbnail for our follow up video on Revenge of the Red Baron. Phelan and I are dressed in black trench coats and look like we're solving a mystery. Tobey Maguire screams and points at the Red Baron toy, who winks at us. The text says, "You decrepit piece of ****!"

It turns out, this insane Tobey Maguire children's film was originally a horror movie?! Our follow up video on Revenge of the Red Baron is now public, please share!
youtu.be/b0fdx04lXVo

It's very insane

*pan not poly

But also

One of the biggest lies in American culture is that the wealthy got wealthy by making morally good choices (ie working hard) and the poor got poor by making morally bad choices (ie being lazy and irresponsible) and that they both deserve what they got.

Of The Devil Chapter 3 goes CRAAAAAAAZY

Cool. So Dems should run on this to get majorities and impeach his dumb ass.

Correct

He will almost certainly be dead before then, but what a fucking dipshit. What would conservatives have if they didn’t have their childish grievances?

I need to make more fat gay men but these anime women need some boyfriends. And Liza needs someone.

My Tomodachi island so far:
My sona
My PF2 character
Liza Minelli
Garnet (FFIX)
Zidane (FFIX)
Rita (Kingohger)
Edo Phoenix (Yu-Gi-Oh GX)
A fat gay dude
A fat poly NB robot

I never believe The Gays™ walk faster than everyone until I'm in a building full of people and I'm going three times faster and have to avoid people like it's Mario Kart. GET OUT OF MY WAY!

Mike Nellis @MikeNellis "I'M NO LONGER CATHOLIC!" Hannity ABANDONS HIS FAITH for Trump NELLIS X.com • +*+

Amazing that in the national divorce the libs are getting the NFL, butter and cooking oil, being attracted to adult women, standup comedy, Bud Light, and now also Catholicism

Oh goodness 🥵

How do you turn regular water into holy water? Boil eight hot dogs in it, then let it cool.

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Pope Leo XIV theonion.com/the-onions-exclusive-int...

Imagine how many more developmentally disabled teenagers the FBI would have been baiting into terrorism charges on Discord if Kash hadn’t been doing the Counter Strike Door Stuck video but to his office.

OH NO

🤣🤣🤣

Look. Dancing is illegal.

🥰

Too bad, Sadarangani! Not going! Get fucked!

A VCR never sold my private info to a nazi

>:T

HOA email blast that there was a white guy with an axe in the parking lot of my section (though they called it the section across from me lol) and honestly it just looks like a dude grabbed a tool from his truck but I guess you never know!