(Obligatory ‘we’re all okay’ even though I nearly died in childbirth and am not allowed to get pregnant ever again. We’re alive, we made it, I have two gorgeous children, I’ll process my trauma some other time)

We had a baby! We’re all okay.

I wish I was one of those women who had no symptoms until their waters break and they have the baby a few hours later but prodromal labour and really long tedious latent phases is apparently how my body likes to give birth

The last few weeks of pregnancy are such a mindfuck cause you spend the entire time feeling sore and weird and crampy and like you might be in early labour but NOTHING HAPPENS

Parenting does that. I’m on social media so much less these days. Too busy (and too happy) with real life.

It was very lovely and wholesome and village life/parenting is sometimes just really really nice.

We take toddler on a walk around the village every day and every day we say hi to the same elderly cat. Who is very sweet and patient and has taught her a lot about gentle hands. Today as we said hi the owner came out of the house and told us her name and gave us some cat treats to give her.

Thank you! Time for this baby’s eviction notice. Though my daughter was nearly two weeks late so 🥴

And everyone marks differently!

We need to get you a senior cane and someone willing to use it hard!!

I could have the baby literally anytiiime and I’ve def still had cane marks weeks later, seems to be the only thing that lasts 😂

I mean he also promised me a caning but I feel like the midwives would have questions if I showed up to birth with cane marks

Apparently I’m still not allowed to touch the thermostat 🥴 seems unfair. Also scoldings and corners are overly mean without spanking

I was nine months postpartum last time by the time I wanted him to touch me again haha so he’ll have to have a good memory

a woman is sitting on a couch with her eyes closed and says oh god get out get out get out get out ALT: a woman is sitting on a couch with her eyes closed and says oh god get out get out get out get out

I have been pregnant for approximately 30 million weeks and I’m so over it and so done

Got embarrassing reminder that even if I’m 38 weeks pregnant the rules don’t stop applying and even if he can’t spank me he can still punish me 🙈🙈

Spent most of my life up avoiding and hating Mother’s Day and trying to pretend it’s not happening and now I’m a mother I can’t avoid it anymore and I hate it 🥲

Woke up sore and so so needy. Getting harder to do anything about it and being denied by my own body is very cruel

Sometimes I think ‘maybe I could have three kids’ and then late pregnancy reminds me that putting my body through this twice is enough 🤪

Same! I’m about to go on maternity leave with no certainty that there’s a job for me when I come back. Time to start looking for something else?!

Just peed myself while vomiting. There really is no dignity in pregnancy

Someone was so rude!! But I told them off and they blocked me lol so now their comment is gone

I had lunch out on my own today while toddler napped at home with her dad and it felt like an almost unspeakable luxury

Why is it that whenever I post on fetlife I come to regret it lol. People are so annoying

Fully liquid poo today 🥲 toddlers with stomach bugs are hard work

I’m sorry I missed all of this. Sending big tight hugs 🫂

❤️❤️

All very tired today. Not enough sleep. She seems off but not sure if tired or ill. Just put her down, hopefully she lets us all sleep a bit more tonight

No idea what caused it! It came out of nowhere and she doesn’t seem ill today. I think she might be teething. We’re all very tired today, not enough sleep for anyone

I love being caned. The ritual of it. The pain is unlike anything else. The marks last so much longer. And I love the deep, long lasting soreness. If I had to pick a favourite implement it would always be a cane 🙈