"Horse urine perfume: why online bargains may be dangerous" headline from BBC News, above a stock phot of a woman blocking her nostrils while holding perfume

🎵 She wore some...

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https://view.eumetsat.int/geoserver/ows?service=WMS&request=GetMap&version=1.3.0&layers=mumi:worldcloudmap_ir108&styles=&format=image/png&crs=EPSG:4326&bbox=-90,-180,90,0&width=4096&height=4096

@eumetsat.int Good morning! EUMETVIEW and the geoserver have been returning errors since last night, is this a known issue?

(I know PaaS ran on AWS but it would have been a good starting point for a move to UK-native infra)

We did have GOV.UK PaaS until it got decommissioned right before digital sovereignty became Actually Quite Important

Bob Mortimer reading from a card on Would I Lie To You

Job listings for what3words - 4 business development associates, one senior front end engineer and one mobile automation engineer. The business development associates are divided into Arabic, German, Japanese and Korean speakers, all based in Mongolia, with a salary of £13.2k. The tech roles are based in Vietnam with salaries of 2 to 3.5k per month

Hiring a bunch of salespeople, apparently

I'd honestly prefer if they were upfront about whatever sub-decimal percentage on their earnings report they're trying to make go up rather than telling extremely obvious lies

Get more from your eBay balance Hi Matthew, You can now enjoy better flexibility and control when managing your earnings on eBay. Starting today, available funds will stay in your eBay balance, instead of being sent to your bank account automatically every quarter. This makes it easier for you to build up your funds, set money aside for a future purchase or withdraw whenever you like. With eBay balance, you can: Shop on eBay using funds from your sales Access earnings in one place Pay for delivery labels, promote your listings and more

Incredible weasel wording from eBay here. Instead of automatically transferring funds to your bank account every quarter (which was already ridiculous) they now just stay in eBay indefinitely and you have to manually withdraw them. This is "more flexibility and control".

Tap with a long silver spout that looks like a nose and white handles with silver ends that look like eyes

Hard not to anthropomorphise the tap in this airbnb

Petition: Give me an extra £10,000 so I can pay my debt and buy a rice krispie square bar Send money to 04-19-04 51198142 so I can pay my bills and debts because of the terrible minimum wage. Plus I can finally afford rice krispies

Thank you, I'm glad it's useful! At the moment it looks like it's taking about a month for petitions to be approved after reaching the moderation threshold (5 signatures). Rejections are taking 1-2 weeks, though more obvious ones (eg petition.parliament.uk/petitions/76...) are done within a day

"one in 20" is a nice scary way of saying 5% and they conveniently omit that it means only about 20% of disabled people have a blue badge

Annual Benefit Statements We are aware of an issue that occurred on the Civil Service Pensions Scheme (CSPS) member portal for around 35 minutes on 30 March 2026, affecting the accuracy of a small number of Annual Benefit Statements (ABS) generated in this period. 138 members either received personal ABS data belonging to other members and/or had their personal data seen by other members. All impacted members will be written to by 9am on 3 April 2026 via secure message. If you have not received correspondence from us, your data was not impacted in any way. This was identified quickly, ABS functionality was immediately suspended, and a full investigation undertaken.

Good news! The Civil Service Pension Scheme website can now show you an Annual Benefit Statement 😃

Bad news! Not necessarily *your* ABS 🙃

www.civilservicepensionscheme.org.uk/memberhub/kb...

#Capita

www.get-approval-to-spend.service.gov.uk/p/login

Here's the login screen of Government Assurance Services, which replaces spend approvals

Bodes well!

Artemis is cool and I know it was a bit explodey but I do wish the Space Shuttle still existed

Sounds like you're not having a very g'day

As riddles go it's not one of the classics

Well, don't leave us in suspense?

So everything that's symmetrical is only stored once in the UV too? Cool!

So where does he keep his teeth?!

Hi guys it's my first day on Earth, could anyone tell me if a ground invasion in the Middle East ever works out well

Again, maybe they shouldn't publish *every* petition

Police to reassess Morgan McSweeney phone theft over address error Force previously said it was ‘too busy’ to investigate theft despite it potentially holding sensitive information

Context: www.theguardian.com/politics/202...

Yeah but he would say that wouldn't he

Fuck, I forgot to buy anyone's Durham Day gifts

Amazon Alexa's UK personality to change with Echo AI update There has been criticism the Echo has stagnated, while other AI chatbots have become much easier to communicate with.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

"UK consumers will notice an immediate difference," she added. "Using Alexa+ is a very different experience." For example, I asked the current Alexa whether I needed an umbrella today. It responded, "no rain is expected today". At a UK demo of Alexa+, it responded, "actually, you can leave the brolly at home, with sunny skies and no rain in the forecast, you'll be sorted without it".

Found in a BBC article about the new £19.99 Alexa+ service. Is this actually a selling point? That it takes Alexa four times longer to tell you it's not going to rain?

A baby blue heron perched on a hand. It has a fluffy head and looks quite dinosaur-like

What a wild experience for those fans, knowing they held the fate of your shows in their hands like a tiny fragile bird

It's made with the GPX files from the official maps, which are missing a lot of sections around East Anglia. Hopefully that will be updated soon now the path is fully open. There's also no GPX for the South West Channel section - I'll try and sort that out.