Working on my posture, so my neck doesn’t hurt after smashing my head on my desk all day

Working on my posture, so my neck doesn’t hurt after smashing my head on my desk all day

For my anniversary I got two chicks at the same time. But they left pretty much as soon as they were done hooking up the sticky pads to my chest

If things keep going at this rate I’m going to do a swear

i just sent the title of the new pod to someone who believes there is an anti-Taft cabal headed by jelly roll 🫡

I live in NC. The most delicious part of ALL of this, is that Phil Berger redrew his own gerrymandered congressional map, and then lost it. 💀
#karma

This might be the greatest split-screen ever broadcast.

They’ll play this in museums in future.

(🎥 LCI 🇫🇷)

American tax dollars subsidize defense contractors' yachts. War is their product. Our tax dollars buy it.

Republicans funnel our money to the War Hawks & bypass EVERY tax funded program that would use our hard earned money on the American people.

WAKE UP, VOTERS.

War is profit - not security.

Nobody is worse at handling money than someone who has been rich their whole life. As someone who has lived poor his whole life, I can assure you we’re better at budget management than any rich person

Epstein files

1. Let Penix throw deep outside the numbers
2. Ask Tua to throw shallow/intermediate middle of field
3. Profit

My biggest regret is that in my youth, I hardly even wang chunged.

Sublime self titled, 40 oz to freedom
Full moon fever
Pink Floyd More
Most Beatles
Van Morrison hard nose the highway, moondance
Ween Quebec
Grateful Dead mars hotel
Television marquee moon
Beck mutations, mellow gold, midnight vultures

-Dean Ween Group Rock2
-Dead Milkmen Beelzebubba

I forgot
-Kings of Leon youth and young manhood, and because of the times
-Tom Petty wildflowers not sure if I mentioned that
-Nirvana never mind
-and I may work Steppenwolf’s greatest hits into the rotation

I love that i get to say “I’m just texting Yikes Mountain” to another human

And I left out:
-Beastie Boys check your head
-Louis Shelton touch me
-soul coughing irresistible bliss
-all of Father John
-and that phosphorescent album of Willie Nelson covers

a random text from a friend that makes me puke laugh; Among the other spring rotation is clap your hands say yeah Coldplay parachutes Weezer blue Weezer green plants and animals the end of that, dead milkman be a Bubba eels beautiful freak and daisies of the galaxy Mason Jennings self titled Marcy Playground self titled and Shapeshifter back 1 foot in the grave Nirvana unplugged most of the cake discography the dew group rock two and tribe called quest midnight marauders

ok this text is from a dude who is 1 or 2 people that me puke laugh instantly

Hahah drunken voice to text strikes again! You’re welcome

👩‍🍳 😘

7 People profiting from this

Data Centers By The Numbers https://theonion.com/data-centers-by-the-numbers/

C’mon Ides of March..
Do your fucking thing

Trump Wins $60 On Kalshi Betting He’ll Bomb Iran

Trump Wins $60 On Kalshi Betting He’ll Bomb Iran theonion.com/trump-wins-60-on-kalshi-...

unicorn in traffic text: getting stoned and still outperforming all the sober people

Ayup.
We ride!

New addition to the bookshelf (hi randy)

I say this as earnestly as possible.

Shingles. Doesn’t. Care.

Veterans slam new VA rule for determining disability ratings The new rule states that a disability level must be based on how well a veteran functions while on medication and not on the underlying impairment.

I told you they’d come after Veterans’ benefits. www.stripes.com/veterans/202...

Zuckerberg grilled about Meta's strategy to target 'teens' and 'tweens' The billionaire tech mogul's testimony was part of a landmark social media addiction trial in Los Angeles. The jury's verdict in the case could shape how some 1,600 other pending cases from families and school districts are resolved.

The billionaire tech mogul's testimony was part of a landmark social media addiction trial in Los Angeles. The jury's verdict in the case could shape how some 1,600 other pending cases from families and school districts are resolved. n.pr/4qLOW99

This Beagle’s dramatic 'play dead' on command is the funniest thing I’ve seen today