I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake By A Horse Hello. I am a horse. I work very hard at my job of being a horse. When humans say move the heavy thing, I move the heavy thing. When humans sit on top of me and pull on my head, I carry them where they want to go. The main food the humans give me is hay and oats. But I am thinking it would be nice to have a different food. I am thinking I would like to try cake. Yes, yes. Cake. I know all about it. When humans eat cake, it is in glad times. It is the food for a celebration, such as when a woman becomes 47. I have seen cake on the Fourth of July. When humans have a cake, they stand around it and clap hands and smile and say happy birthday at each other. Sometimes there are beautiful markings on a cake, such as balloons or a pink shape. Sometimes the top of a cake is on fire and a boy must blow on the fire with mouth wind. This is the scariest cake. I do not want this kind. But I will eat any other cake. Any cake that is not the fire cake that tries to kill the boy. Please understand: I do not get money for doing work. I do not get to go inside the house. All I am either doing my horse job or standing in my pen or eating food off the floor. I always do these things. But I have never once gotten cake and I would like it very much. I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children. I am more helpful to the farm. Children do not move the heavy things like me or let anyone ride on them. And yet they get cake. Maybe the humans will realize this. Maybe they will say, "You know who deserves cake? That horse. That horse whose back we are always on." Every day I dream about what it will be like if I get to eat cake. Here is what will happen. First, I will walk to the cake and putt my nose at it like hrrfff to make and stomping my hooves to make sure it is not a snake. Then I will trot in a circle to show that I am a horse and I am large. After that, I will nuzzle the cake to …

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me.

It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

thanks to AI our slow and humiliating national suicide will be punctuated by visual media that is so good even a dog could jack off to it

being a villainfucker is truly a lost art nowadays amongst all this ridiculous moral panic 😔 even the ones who self proclaim as villainfuckers want to reform their villain blorbos.. i dont want him reformed i want him worse

That's home. That's us.

This image of home just came down from the Artemis II crew.

Taken after their translunar injection burn, there are aurorae at top right and lower left, and zodiacal light at lower right.

Credit: NASA/Reid Wiseman

Newspaper headline: "Sex slave Woman wanted for burglary" "A woman who had five pitbull puppies cloned in South Korea is wanted in Tennessee on burglary charges, lawyers there said today. Joyce McKinney, 58, was accused of telling a 15-year-old boy to burgle a house to raise cash to buy a false leg for a horse. She fled Britain in 1977 to avoid trial for allegedly abducting a Mormon missionary and making him her sex slave."

Every sentence is a future bestselling novel

“go back to the moon but this time we have really good cameras” was a fantastic idea

Out-of-Print Criterion Collection Editions - The Criterion Channel Collectors rejoice! Not every film the Criterion Collection has released over the last four decades remains in print. Formats change, licenses expire, and catalogues evolve. But here on the Channel, w...

How the hell did they pull this off.

Andrew and Nel for @onigmos.bsky.social 💕 i love these two ngl!!!

A comic strip titled The Amazing World of Tomorrow. A food delivery robot cooler drives down a sidewalk. It crashes into a rental scooter. It backs up. It crashes into the rental scooter again. The scooter wobbles. The scooter falls to the ground as the food delivery robot backs up again. A driverless taxi crashes into both the scooter and the food delivery robot sending them flying.

The Amazing World of Tomorrow

what it feels like to be an nsfw artist sometimes

Lain's dad: With this new Navi that takes up your whole room and has a giant industrial antifreeze cooling system you can navigate the World Wide Web

(two lains are busy together silently watching a postage stamp sized quicktime movie of the rockafeller skank that took 19hrs to download)

Girls from school: Lain do you want to come to the Cyberia club again tonight? Sure last night we saw a dude fucked up on bug drugs kill two kids on the dancefloor with a laser sighter handgun, but,

Lain (not there, at home dressed like a teddy bear, signing into a MUD as "sailor Lain",

Voice of the wired (unsure who is talking): Ancient people carried within their minds their own guestbooks, signed them, signed each other's guestbooks. That was lost. With a connected internet mankind has created the final guestbook with one place for a signature, to be signed by God

Lain: yeah

I am more and more convinced that when cis people want to debate whether trans people get human rights, the only correct response is "I don't treat whether or not people get human rights as a debate topic or hang around people who do" followed by leaving.

we do, and it’s wrong. “Pre” relegates precum to a subordinate status, always “less than.” It has its own story that deserves to be told

Oh, you think you walk the path of Christ? Name one sex worker who would weep over your death

Emo boy L🍓🍰
#deathnote #fanart

I note saying that I believe that even if you think you have no artistic skill, I'd rather see your effort than your A.I.

In today's installment of Old Lady Yells At Clouds:

ink drawing (using brush and nib and whiteout on arches hot press with some digital cleanup.) two men called Dan and Enver from my comics BIRTH OF THE SUN and THE SOLAR SYSTEM, pressing and nuzzling their faces together, mouths open and wanting in the preface to a kiss.

COME UP AND SEE ME

brush and nib on arches hot press. a short kiss and a long embrace.

On the 20th of January, 1973, Portuguese agents assassinated Amílcar Cabral, the anti-colonial revolutionary who led the struggle to liberate Guinea-Bissau and Cape Verde.

"Either we admit that there really is a struggle against imperialism which interests everybody, or we deny it."

I keep thinking “my god the people they’ve killed seem like exceptionally good folks” and I think the lesson there is that they’re not exceptional, but that wonderful people abound and that a baseline distrust in humanity is a shitty conservative trope that privileges power over collective strength

💛

huge ears braless elf has been doing numbers on tumblr lately for some reason, so you guys have to look at her now + new drawing of her (first two from 2024)

*has sex with you in a way that both advances the plot and reinforces the themes of your narrative arc*

My oc sid and Trona (B0nerbats oc) doing the guard dog meme with one character on their knees holding onto the other possessively. Trona is holding a phone taking a pic of the two, she is wearing an all blue outfit, crop top, mini skirt and high heels. Sid is wearing a green t shirt with a red undershirt black pants and grey boots with spikes.

⛓️Sid and Trona⛓️

if i could lock my account i'd be posting the rancid nasty evil pornography i've been working on. so much fun

modesty laws prevented showing even one lousy frame of John Waters' PINK FLAMINGOS (1972) in the trailer, so the only footage in it is of people reacting to a screening they just came out of. every single type of extant queer person is contained in the specific sequences I have selected here