last night a DJ exploded my balls

The Blood on Satan's Claw

🩸opening TONIGHT at 8PM🩸
🩸THE BLOOD ON SATAN’S CLAW🩸
🩸at the MERCURY THEATER🩸
events.humanitix.com/satan

do ye have barhar blast ere

🤷

are you tellin me an april fooled this rice

got em all cut

awwww damn

when you hit the “cook mode” toggle on a recipe site it starts mining bitcoin

fixing everything would fix me

lady on jeopardy just said “what are moder honets?”

mind the worldeater

there are like 2 good flavors of celcius and the rest taste like dentist

long allergies

open the door... mystery date a new internet radio show with your djs madame trash heap and charm city art spice beginning tuesday 31 march 2026 7-9pm edt gutsy radio dot org

i'm sure this is a coincidence: tune in tonight, 7-9pm edt, to my new radio show MYSTERY DATE, streaming on GutsyRadio.org

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 🦀🔪🦀🔪🎂

bog cruise

I’m closest to edible bird’s nest. I have no real flavor of my own but I’m made primarily from spit and enhance dishes with my texture

the bill comes due, humanity

I grew up with stop and shop and now I am in giant land, they’re all I’ve ever known. giant cashiers generally have great banter which makes most of the difference for me (beyond cheap ham)

A cardboard display of little hug waters, 2 for $1

if we’re going solely by the size of little hugs this economy is doing great

if your grocery store scoffs at a request for “your cheapest ham” you can just leave

A bumper sticker on a red truck: IF YOU HONK AT ME I WILL KILL MYSELF

solid

the time has come to pump this in my vehicle

chainmail glove, for bagels

new DMX Krew, things are looking up

A drainage pipe stuffed with a pair of plaid buccees slippers

mood

charlie’s bees, just like a stylish raconteur surrounded by a cloud of hot bees

tabula rasa. beautiful

I learned this from a travel doc when I was preparing for a trip and now when I see food back home that looks good as hell but also sketchy I reach for my little pink friends