Dreamt my maternal grandfather was still alive and named “Ben” which he isn’t and wasn’t

How does Gumby poop

ChatGPT how do I make my boogers really flaky

Dude, fuck off

Mulcair’s left eye dispenses Lagavulin and the right dispenses Port Askaig 100-proof

Found out Avi Lewis won about 20 seconds ago and I can already taste the tears of centrists and neolibs as though they were delicious drams of Islay scotch

Last time I went to Seattle I had my wife take a picture of me with my bum on the Swedish. It was such a detour I’m amazed she still wanted to marry me after that.

Singing Heavy Songs How heavy music heals and unites Indigenous people on both sides of a border.

Across the Blackfoot Confederacy, heavy music has become a conduit for release and repair. Reid Blakley (@abellyirked.bsky.social) traces how community-led festivals in Canada and the US are transforming pain into connection, mentorship, and healing.

www.newfeeling.ca/singing-heavy-songs/

A fast-food flier for chicken fingers and potato wedges that look as described in the AI-generated artwork

Been waiting for Calgary to finally get a yellow-turds-and-peach-slices restaurant

No one makes fun of Danny DeVito for being short because there’s no reason to be mean to him.

I was also bullied and *I* have a life goal of giving Ben Shapiro a swirlie (it’d be like dunking a teabag)

As a 5’4” man I agree

It’s good and the end of it may just blow your mind (or make you go “huh interesting”)

[Gatineau bullying Ottawa]

More like SNOTtawa. I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you

Ok back to not paying attention to, or knowing anything about, baseball

I went as Gomez

Just realized one of the very first things I did in November was *shave off* a moustache

Can someone who’s not a chud or a tankie give me a reason to be cynical about Carney’s housing thing he announced today because it seems pretty decent compared to what I would’ve expected from the Libs

How many people who would believe this also know what “hyperbole” means

Most articles written about this pissed me off because they called it “AI” when it was clearly a deepfake

Might try getting into Sabbath now

I like when things are brown. Sometimes it means they’re chocolate, or a dog. But then of course there’s poop.

was just on a flight seated next to the current keyboard player for [famous band] and at one point he was Googling the former keyboard player

Let’s make this relevant uhhhhh every ICE agent past and present should also be eaten by bears and also lizards and what the hey especially hungry people too.

If you subscribe to some form of homophobia and the song doesn’t immediately reverse all of that I think you should be eaten by bears.

Not topical and I’m not the target demographic here, but if Chappel Roan’s “The Giver” doesn’t make you feel unbounded joy I think you should hit yourself in the face for a million years until you die.

If I were Bud Abbott I would simply not recruit multiple baseball players whose surnames are entire English sentences

The thing about the Who’s On First routine is that it’s premised on there being a guy whose last name is literally I Don’t Know. An 8-year-old could come up with something better

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