WE DO.

SCHWARBS

They have some genuinely kickass giveaways and I am mad about it.

Is that not adorable?

I just don’t think anyone but Red Sox fans should have to watch the Red Sox in April. These are bad games that you’re making national games.

I would pay so much money to hang out with Pedro Martinez and Jimmy Rollins.

It may be because the Flyers are winning or because it’s not Twitter, but I’ve noticed a marked lack of homophobic shit-talk so far during the hockey playoffs. Have a cookie.

Motion to start every Patriots Day game with David Ortiz bellowing ‘THIS IS OUR FUCKING CITY!’

I thought the same thing initially.

I didn’t notice the R5 line sign the first time!

That’s why you don’t lose to shitty teams, Arsenal.

I’m going to ragenap about it.

FOR FUCK’S SAKE

One goal, less fighting, dipshits

Little bit.

Soccer was a mistake.

KEEP WATCHING.

Heh. The goal this time is to do a bunch of stuff that we’ve never done before, so it’s all new restaurants and shizz.

Thank you. I appreciate it.

End of May. Why?

I have had just about enough of this shit, Arsenal. FOCUS.

Love to be a jangle of nerves on a Sunday afternoon. THANKS, ARSENAL.

(Currently wearing an Arsenal jersey and Buc-ees pajama pants because I am that much of a globetrotter.)

This is asking for ghosts. You’re paying for ghosts.

Those are some good pierogis, man.

(The Curse of the Bambino is bullshit and so is the Kalas Curse because it is the PHILLIES IN APRIL, calm down.)

Because it’s April and the Phillies are alllllllllllways shitty in April.

As someone who was inundated with the “Curse of the Bambino” shit I say keep it simple and make it the Kalas Curse.

One of the niecelets has our Union tickets tonight and is apparently having the time of her life.

Science is fucking incredible, man.

It’s been a real week. This should be taking me a lot longer.