Erik Johnson is wearing a suit you’d wear to a party where they were serving bloody marys with slim jims in them

Bob Boughner

Wayne Presley

jim hughson voice

is there anyone in North America better at their job than Cody Ceci’s agent

you guessed it

want to be a fly on the wall when Scott Laughton and Charlie Day find out they have the same father

did Olczyk bet his 401k on the Kings

we will miss his handsome face

forgot Anze Kopitar e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ was retiring at the end of this week

relatively

Brian Dumoulin plays defense for a team in the Stanley Cup playoffs in the year 2026

you can tell it’s a big game for the LA Kings because Drew Doughty combed his hair with a taco bell chalupa

penguins flyers series is going to be the cannonball run scene when Jackie Chan and his partner withdraw from the race to stay behind and fight the bikers

the new Hulk Hogan statue is tasteless and reprehensible and the wwe should be ashamed of themselves

hopefully you’re writing about the Oilers/Ducks series by the time you reach Depth Or Simply Death

this guy’s last name is the word the guy yells at the 1:37 mark of Come Baby Come

Foot By The Foot

rebrand “locker clean out day” to “fuckin losers with the boo boo lip day”

we’ve always been on the same wavelength Joe

Based on a blend of proprietary metrics and algorithms, here is a list of who the actual NHL award winners should be:

HART: Artturi Lehkonen
SELKE: Artturi Lehkonen
NORRIS: Artturi Lehkonen
VEZINA: Artturi Lehkonen

Baby Jessica… you have a lot of well-wishers here tonight,

selling my IP to a nascent AI firm, so when you start seeing me post AI generated images of Jamie Benn eating pizza with his feet and Linda Cardellini replacing Sharon Stone in the interrogation scene from Basic Instinct it wasn’t me, it was them

the penguins biggest offseason need is an assistant coach who looks like this

hell yeah

Printing 14 of these so I only need to do laundry once every two weeks

I despise how all-in I am on this season

Annie Wilkes as a Marvel character

go Avs

Doctor healing patient with light