Chicken George in Worcester

Dreamt about a Caramac Wholenut bar, and now the real world is even more disappointing. Might have a nap and eat some more.

Never ever bloody anything ever

"And God saw the light and it was good; He saw the quarterly bill and that was not good.

And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night, and so passed his GCSE"

The Bible According to Spike Milligan

Are Arsenal really going to choke and give the people of Manchester the bragging rights once more? Or can they cling on to second place and keep United down in third?

Weekend cheeses -

Camembert
Cheshire
Comté
Dairylea (Saturdays only)

Tommy Cooper always took Reverend Spooner to a Spa in June.

Made bread and butter pudding using Aldi Rhubarb and Custard Hot Cross Buns and it is phenomenal!

Really they should hide the Easter Eggs in various places around the store

We're all just here trying to find out what the equivalent to CTRL-ALT-DEL is.

Inside each of us are two Microsoft Outlooks, and neither of them are working.

Rockin' Around the Charming Easter Themed Door Wreath

All I Want for Easter is Eggs

Simply Having a Wonderful Hot Cross Bun

Let's just pray they don't need to print anything at any point

A white flower with edges turning brown sits on the pavement

They got some nice toasting going on with their meringue, not sure why they just abandoned it on the pavement

Spent ages thinking the feet were labelled the wrong way round - because if you were drawing dots on feet you'd do it on the sole, right?

I have questions about the huge mini egg though -

1. Is the thickness of the shell in proportion, or is it just a huge mass of chocolate with a thin shell?

2. Would an averagely fit middle-aged male be able to pick up and carry something that weighs the same as an adult cheetah?

Chocolatiers create 'world's largest' Mini Egg at Cadbury World The milk chocolate colossus is 70cm tall and weighs 55kg, the same as an adult cheetah.

Give it a couple of years and they'll have created the world's smallest normal Easter Egg, amirite?

www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

12 tons of KitKats? Surely they'd have spotted the thieves, not exactly light-fingered were they?

What time is it? What place of man?

"UA92 employed an average of 141 people throughout the year. During the current year UA92 enrolled 490 students across our multiple entry points."

🤦‍♂️

Hope broadcasters have got together and worked out what song they're going to play at the same time the next day

Day 1 - perfect reason to get drunk.
Day 2 - perfect hangover cure.

Finally he can do some good in the world.

Somebody sort this - I rarely drink these days, but when that app pings I'll have a beer in one hand and a gin in the other and won't stop until I wake up the next day with no memory of why I got that drunk, and then I'll find out and can enjoy the sweet feeling anew.

I have a joke about Kermit the Frog but I'm not going to explain it if you don't get it.

Gilet, from the French for warm body, cold arms

Got a feeling today might be "sports student in shorts and flip-flops" day on campus

Leave three up top so they have to drop a couple of defenders back or risk being caught on the counter

Just picked up the first ice-cream van of the year on Merlin