I spent 28 hours on boeing aircraft in February 😖

They shrunk the North American Creme Egg but they are too scared to shrink them in the UK and my local British Shoppe came through 😭😭😭🙏

I found a place near my house that imports the REAL, FULL-SIZED cadbury creme eggs

All my tweets will be sleep related forever sorry

I have stopped having stress dreams of my own teeth falling out and am now having stress dreams of my children's teeth failing out. That's parenting

Slept through the night, we are so back

Welcome to our home. Due to our boys being preteens we ask that you refrain from using the word "balls" during your visit. To avoid unstoppable hilarity and chaos please use SPHERES to refer ro any round object, thank you

A weird brown cartoon bird with a longish beak, bright green wings, and no tail sitting on a tree branch

Something that regularly makes me laugh is that AI can never accurately generate an image of a kiwi (bird) due to being overtrained on kiwi (fruit)

Painting of tall mugwort by wheat field

Absinthe
Digital painting

I'm trying a sleep meditation podcast because I'm exhausted but I can't get past the pure dystopianism of having a guided relaxation interrupted by an extra loud ad for deodorant 😭

I love Nikola Jokic so much. Imagine being kind of annoyed that you're that good at basketball

I've been up since 3.30am, this is unsustainable

I am battling jetlag like gandalf fighting the balrog

Extremely true and also much worse in a NZ accent 😫

Paperback cover: The Man with the Golden Arm by Nelson Algren

Maybe the funniest and saddest at the same time: The Man with the Golden Arm

Huge recommend

Yeah I got these as a gift and unfortunately I won't be using them much

These things are uncomfortable and fall out every time I move? And I have to snack myself repeatedly in the ear to pause them? Do people try to wear these in public because they only work for me if I'm fully horizontal or actively holding them inside my ear

Why have we as a society accepted samsung ear buds

I finished Nina Dunic's The Clarion while overseas and phewwww I loved it

I am back. Out-of-office in effect for one more day. Ever notice how jetlag feels exactly like a hangover

Obsessed with the guy in the row ahead of me on the plane who watched 12 minutes of Oppenheimer and then switched to Dumb and Dumber

And then a bagpiper busking in town

Being in a supermarket in NZ means hearing all the weird deep cuts that somehow became successful singles here but nowhere else

Highly recommend taking your school-age children to the beaches of your youth and picking up shells to take home

Stack of books: New Zealand's Best Short Stories; Seashells of New Zealand; Native Trees of New Zealand; The Ace of Diamonds Gang and Other Stories by Owen Marshall

Staying at a good old kiwi bach with an excellent bookshelf

I applaud this and repeat my intermittent plea for a The Dark is Rising BBC adaptation with the production values of His Dark Materials featuring Timothy Dalton with his sonorous Welsh accent as Merriman while he's still around to play the role, damn it

Sandy beach, ocean, big sky, hills in the distance

Beach day 🏖