I saw the end of a rainbow for the first time in my life today. It terminated on the lake. I didn’t take a picture because it was legitimately the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, and being there was the only option.
I CACKLED
why is pete hegseth always Visibly Moist
The Lakers are my third favorite team, generally speaking- but I DO like OKC, even though Chet Holmgren has the most punchable face in basketball.
They were on like a 9 win streak. Unreal.
The Lakers just got STOMPED. holy shit.
I’ve been going through it and subsequently haven’t been in public for a minute.
This former coworker who I just don’t like (rare for me, ok? I try. With everyone. Can’t with her).
Anyway. She went “oh! It’s Rebecca!”
And I didn’t even think. I just said “404 Rebecca not found.”
I will legitimately just close an app if one of those Royal whatever ads comes on because they’re SO. LONG. And they have SO MANY additional popups. Ugh. I hate it so much.
Game designers are really like, "The best way to get gamers to download our game is to force them to watch an ad for our game for 30 seconds, during which time a timer will count down toward 0, only at 0, a new ad for our game opens, and they can click away from that, but it just takes them to anoth
Underrated runner here is that some general clearly told him to call it an incursion rather than a war and now he's never, ever going to call it anything other than an "excursion," we are ruled by Kevin Kline in A Fish Called Wanda with tertiary syphilis
I hate that I understand all of this someone please smother me with a pillow.
Also hi Jon and Jeb and, begrudgingly, Andy.
Wisconsin is great.
LET’S GO BADGERS.
Poorly drawn diagram
Dusty knob
This entire man was deeply frustrated when I insisted that reading the directions might not be a terrible idea.
This stubborn bitch managed to get the pilot light lit.
I shouldn’t be this satisfied, but that’s what the devil’s lettuce gets you.
And they were coming from a good place, but man it makes me sad that I’m always so focused on how other people feel that I forget to lighten my own mood. And that when I do it’s actually probably more impactful that all of my worrying.
Ugh. Probably should have written this in my journal. 🤣
And they were coming from a good place, but man it makes me sad that I’m always so focused on how other people feel that I forget to lighten my own mood. And that when I do it’s actually probably more impactful that all of my worrying.
Ugh. Probably should have written this in my journal. 🤣
On very rare days I’m in an inexplicably good mood.
And the good mood makes me less worried about other people’s perception of me -and that’s definitely a “like a snake eating itself” scenario but I’m not trynna unpack all that right now- but someone asked me if I was coming off a mushroom trip 🧵
On very rare days I’m in an inexplicably good mood.
And the good mood makes me less worried about other people’s perception of me -and that’s definitely a “like a snake eating itself” scenario but I’m not trynna unpack all that right now- but someone asked me if I was coming off a mushroom trip 🧵
Sometimes self care is going home after a 9 hour bartending shift and housing an entire box of Lucky Charms.
Bartending tonight I’d had enough of this group of dudes and I finally cut in with “a circle is, by definition, perfect. An imperfect circle is some version of an oval.”
I was met- ABSOLUTELY FAIRLY- with blank stares. Pedantry isn’t a great quality in a bartender.
Roberts: Let’s bring in the Secretary of Energy, Chris Wright. He joins us now.
I miss finding old old old tweets that were hilarious, but forgotten.
The way loneliness is amplified when you scream into the void, hoping for a reply…
Y’all ever get so angry your heart rate drops?
This is a real question.
I had to do some research because I thought I was losing it.
Autocorrect tried to change “articulate” to “artichoke,” and honestly at this point yeah. Who gives a shit.
And maybe it’s pertinent to note that I’m a bartender, but it shouldn’t be.
If you have a problem with someone, or you think they have a problem with you?
Use. Your. Words.
Some new person at work doesn’t understand why we don’t get along.
I know this because five different people have told me as much.
You know who DOES know?
Me. The one person you haven’t spoken to.
This bartender would like to report that she had no idea so many people were bobsledding experts.
