*mood*

Shout-out to the 8 thieving cowards in DC. See you next November, pendejos.

I think we should get another Punisher season with ICE rolling up on Frank Castle. 💅🏼✨

Remember, in America you're only a heartbeat away from financial hardship. Source: Me. Federal Furloughed Freelancer 🤡

*waking up today in New Jersey* ✨

They tried to threaten Jersey voters with bomb scares. Mfers, we drive the parkway, the turnpike, 80, and 22 every goddamn day. We ain't scared of SHIT.

I love my country New Jersey. ✨ May the Taylor Ham and Pork Roll be with you this beautiful morning. ☀️

It's Shutdown week. I needed this. 😌 Rather watch the fall of Rome in my robe and fuzzy socks.

It's Shutdown Eve here at the fed. I'd leave milk and cookies out for Ronald Reagan but I hate that fucker...

The modern medical understanding of autism was developed in 1943. Tylenol went to market in 1955. Use some basic critical thinking, ffs...

If he ain't obsessed with you sis, he ain't the one.

Me anytime I run into a cyber truck...

Trump Deferred Resignation Plan Cost $15 Billion, Democrats Say The government paid nearly $15 billion for 200,000 federal employees not to work after taking deferred resignation packages, according to a reportfrom Senate Democrats.

The cost of DOGE
news.bloomberglaw.com/daily-labor-...

American taxpayers are currently paying for 154,000 federal employees to stay at home and not work, some through September 30, others through the end of December. That's the genius DOGE savings plan. Spoiler alert: It didn't actually save you money. It's costing us much more.

In a world run by women, starvation would never be used as a weapon of war.

I choose to self-deport from relationships with MAGA individuals. 👋🏻

Welp... Found out the guy I was seeing was a secret MAGA. DUMPED. Have the day you voted for.

"Just because I voted for him doesn't mean I voted for this!"

Yes you fucking did. One cannot be separated from the other.

JFC...

These people are out there doing all kinds of mental gymnastics to defend PEDOPHILES! Fucking outrageous. I now understand why the Judeo-Christian God would want to cleanse this whole bitch with fire.

IRS says churches can now endorse political candidates. Pope Leo has the chance to do the funniest shit... 👀

Reminder that "just doing my job" or "just following orders" doesn't morally, ethically, or legally protect you once the dildo of consequences arrives.

Wishing all the young MAGA dudes a very happy Selective Service Awareness month! ✨🥳

🍵

No wonder the Vikings stole the women from the Brits. The two acceptable ways to reach Valhalla was by the sword or losing ones breath between a maiden's thighs. 😏 Death by sword, or death by snu snu.

Laws don't matter. Be gay. Do crimes. ✨

Prepare to get "liberated" from disposable income, if you had any to begin with.

Ran into those little 🍪 hustlers at the entrance to our local Walmart... I'm not strong enough! Their location and customer service was on point. 😩✨ Making money moves. #girlscouts #girlscoutcookies

If I had done that shit I'd be in PRISON right now. Don't tell me I gotta take Cyber Security training ever again. Pendejos.

Some hero made a website to automatically generate those 5 bullet points. It even has a salty mode. 😂 Because fuck Elon, that's why. 🖕🏼
www.OPMreply.com