I was interviewed by a vetter for my friend’s security clearance and let me tell you I had no juicy stories

Sounds awful
But that could happen at home too

Mobile phones to be banned in schools in England under new plans Government amendment to children’s wellbeing and schools bill to replace existing guidance with statutory ban

Research from the children’s commissioner for England last year found that 99.8% of primary schools and 90% of secondary schools already had policies in place that limited or restricted the use of mobile phones during the school day.

www.theguardian.com/politics/202...

He walked so ed davey could run on an inflatable obstacle course

Humans Who Used a Bear Suit to Defraud Car Insurers Are Sentenced to Jail

As a commenter said: imagine the conversation in prison.
‘What are you in for?’
‘Dressing up in a bear costume.’

www.nytimes.com/2026/04/18/u...

They could buff up the stone

Protein

The Mandelson fiasco reveals the true nature of Starmerism This is a prime minister who does not understand the difficult trade-offs involved in governing

Keir Starmer famously said there was "no such thing" as Starmerism. He was half-right: there is no such ideology. There is however an approach to managing and running the country that is core to so many of the government's difficulties that we probably should call 'Starmerism'. In tomorrow's paper:

Prosecutors to Charge D4vd With Murder of Teenage Girl

God this story

www.nytimes.com/2026/04/20/a...

‘Mum’s sooo annoying. Oh, hi mum.’

Creepy pasta

You deffo had time to spare

You had me at bread and butter sandwich

Oh dear! I actually chased up the passport office because they hadn’t renewed my passport only to discover I had actually renewed it the year before and was looking at my expired one

But, but, Kate… I can change

I’ve had discussions about packing here before. I do it last minute (and also am bad), and others do it even a week in advance and edit

Good point

They do actually look big. Or maybe he is v small

I think Girls was brilliant. And I wish I’d had the confidence, creativity, wit as well as massive love bombing and opportunity she had.

Am listening to this.
I am finding myself weirdly jealous of Lena Dunham

Haven’t you two heard of faffing

The annoyance economy isn’t going anywhere We must find our own amusements in dealing with spam, robocalls and chatbots

The annoyance economy isn’t going anywhere ft.trib.al/t7ylnaR

I don’t think I have learned my lesson yet

Haha
I think I might have a mindset fixed pre kids

Yes. I think I err on LTTA though oh is deffo ETTA… and apparently being early is actually on time

We should just cut to the chase

I do think it is funny that starmer’s fashion makeover was essentially to try to turn him into Andy burnham

I just think when it comes to mandelson people will never think to ask

Tucker Carlson to launch publishing imprint with books by Russell Brand and Milo Yiannopoulos Former Fox News host says publishing house Skyhorse ‘looking for books that nobody else will publish’

Missed this

Among the titles set to be published by Carlson’s imprint is Brand’s How to Become a Christian in Seven Days, described by Skyhorse as a “testimony and guide to a timeless, yet zeitgeist-capturing, grounded, yet psychedelic encounter with Christ”.

www.theguardian.com/books/2026/a...

Omfg ffs