oh you sweet summer child

imagine not speaking to someone at work and then watching their snapchat story lol

i am my favorite funniest person

driving to work hung over when it’s 27° blasting crystal castles and i get stopped by a train. i am filled by the wrath of ten gods.

they chose me

crunching my little carrots and wiggling my little feet at work

no more beer skeeting for me

AND CUDDLED AAUAUAUUUUAUAAUAUAUGGHHHHHHHHHAHGHHHHHGGHHHHH

real issue here is i miss my bf so much and need to be fucked to sleep sigh

now hiring someone to come brush my hair until i fall asleep and then promptly leave my house

imagine using tinder 🫵🏻😆

hey guys wanna go down to o acco pe?

work bathroom is clean today but has an underlying fecal smell

my favorite pastime is scrolling through my twitter and laughing at my tweets

work bathroom smells like earthworm dirt and partially digested cheerio shits

the majority of people should be slaughtered.

red bull just makes my rib cage nervous

work bathroom today smells like piss and old mcdonald’s fries

9:26 is scary

im listening to par amore it’s so over for you hoes

fun fact: nothing matters!

fetch me my sharpest blade

second day in a row someone has made the work bathroom smell like a farm, i’m going to set up boobytraps

it’s sauce day fools

n-nononono NO

who needs alcohol when you can ghost hit a salt vape and become the girl from the anti weed commercial

i love the people closest to me so so so sos so so sos sos sos sos so sos so sos so sos much

hey guys don’t worry i fixed everything forever nothing will ever happen again

haven’t felt like myself lately and don’t know where to start looking

had whiskey and now my lazy eye is super bloodshot what does this mean