You expect her to interrupt her stream just to check for toddlers? She’s locked in. She’s in the fucking zone

Have someone use the edges of two nickels. It sounds insane but an old weld engineer taught me that trick and I swear it's better than tweezers

Omg that's so good!

Breaking news: Trump nominee meets at least one of the bare minimum job requirements

Massive Attack and Tom Waits just released the most powerful protest song in years The first new music in over a decade from both the Bristol trip-hop group and the US singer-songwriter is a potent anti-war statement, accompanied by visuals documenting the ongoing chaos, division an...

Imagine being such a piece of shit that Tom Waits comes out of retirement to talk shit about you

www.the-independent.com/arts-enterta...

Testing out recycled Gallagher bits but I'm not getting much traction

He's literally a dentist and also a top barrister

He should go home to his beautiful 45 year old wife

That's not lighting. I used to see her in the Whole Foods near my ex's condo and she always looks like that

Grampa Walton was a blacklisted commie who never named names and an anti-lawn activist

from an ethical standpoint i think that when you personaly feel iffy about a mutual aid request it's definitely okay to simply do nothing and shut your fucking mouth

the whole moral framework underpinning our best arguments against cutting social aid programs is that the cost of harming innocent people who need help isn't worth the dubious "reward" of the system being impossible to game, let me just ask you for a little consistency here

A friend who's also a girl? In this economy?!?

If it's a Dennis B Hooper joint, I'm in

We had wall to wall shag carpeting in a room with a big wood burning stove which meant we had shag carpeting with a million holes burned in it

My parents were never insane enough to put carpet in the bathrooms, thank god lol

We had low pile patterned harvest gold and maroon carpeting in our kitchen, extremely ill advised

Let this shit loose in Philly

Surely someone wants to impress Susan Sarandon

(Whispering) Bruce was better live than Beyoncé. Not by a wide margin but he was better

This is why I leave comments enabled right here, we truly are #strongertogether

I can't decide whether it's more insulting to piss in the classic Calvin pissing pose or to turn backwards and spray it like a skunk but I'm compelled to choose the funnier but more personally humiliating option

I don't want to put my piss on the monument, I want to piss on the monument. It's like the difference between loving and being in love

As a person unaccustomed to pissing outdoors and on vertical surfaces, I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to piss on this thing. Might need to back it up, I think

Octagon. I'm a fool

(Dr Octogon voice)

Shrimp are not food

And I'm being very generous to accommodate the 3rd shift folks

You do not need to be able to talk to someone about your credit card statement, utility bill or literally any consumer good at 3am. Call centers should only be open from 7am-8pm