I have a crease on my face I never had before I'm freaking out. exactly where I'd get one of all places!

does anybody else picture themselves as a living skeleton with all the layers of flesh and webs in between?

dentist hit me with that hobgoblin pack now my eyelids a cinema showing stuart little 6. i could fit that whole sumbitch in my mouth, but i won't

A fire drill sounds like an exciting tool

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ordering pizza in an alien tongue

my creepy stalker ex is following a lot of ya'll on here too. username @skyfullastars

I'd appreciate it if ya'll would block him, but I can't make anyone do that

Whenever I see someone that's pregnant I'm always reminded that they've had sex more recently than me

Going through my checklist before leaving for work:

Keys: ✅
Wallet: ✅
Phone: ✅
Psychosis: ✅✅✅

people get confused about me

no one has a cuter button nose than me

A stop sign painted red and with meatwads face painted on it as well from aqua teen hunger force adult swim

I crave desserts

*Werner Herzog voice*

“A Kit Kat is made of four pieces, called fingers, and each finger can be snapped from the bar, creating a sound not unlike the mandible of an opportunistic lion crunching the unfortunate human hand.”

they are working on a spell that turns red blood cells into Pepsi

Sometimes love from an Angel is too powerful and overwhelming

I’m just going to put you guys down for a sec while I wipe.

hi!

I can't decide if I should listen with my ears or my heart.

It always catches them by surprise when a big heart refuses to keep making room for bullshit.

I forgot about anna nicole smith day one year and let's just say it was a bad year

I can't decide if I should listen with my ears or my heart.

a stuffed toy the looks like a laptop with mouse

logging in

my pussy has freezer burn

saying chat is this real on the bus over & over again while holding my knees rocking back & forth