Apparently the serving size for chips is 10 chips

Listen, I eat 10 chips while deciding if I even want chips

We always used to fly directly over my house while landing in Austin and I always wished for a parachute.

♪ is big and bright ♫

Just a reminder that Trump didn't just bumble us into an unnecessary war -- he deliberately created the conditions that he's now screaming about

…….. Isn’t this like a huge crime the US is accusing Russia of doing to Ukrainian children?

I honestly can’t stomach audience Q&As because of the constant anxiety that some dipshit will ask a question like this.

OCEANS ARE NOW BATTLEFIELDS

A prominent Bluesky elder already hosts Jeopardy

The drunk uncle theory.

You don’t argue with the casually homophobic uncle at Thanksgiving dinner to change his mind; you argue so that the closeted cousin at the kids table knows there’s safe people and better possibilities out there

get the kid in the brown hoodie a scholarship

Molly Lambert @mollylambert I respect the moon's unwillingness to be photographed on a phone 12:31 PM • 12/12/19 • Twitter Web App 59.5K Retweets 294K Likes

Lance St. Laurent @LanceStLaurent When you see this blatant anti-moon propaganda, consider the source The Sun @TheSun • Jan 18, 2019 'Super blood wolf moon' may trigger end of the world this weekend thesun.co.uk/news/8223896/s. 8:32 PM • Jan 20, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone 49.9K Retweets 493 Quote Tweets 238.7K Likes

Paul Ford v @ftrain When the moon hits your knees And you mispronounce trees Sycamore 5:14 AM • 2/27/18 • Twitter for Android 13.6K Retweets 37.3K Likes

dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early astronaut: moon's haunted nasa employee: what? astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon's haunted 10:18 PM - 29 Oct 2018

please enjoy these classic Moon Tweets™

I love doing dishes, but I hate folding laundry. I can’t explain it.

Yesterday, five-year-old Liam and his dad Adrian were released from Dilley detention center. I picked them up last night and escorted them back to Minnesota this morning.

Liam is now home. With his hat and his backpack.

The coolest Congresswoman there’s ever been.

Wouldn’t have made it out of the VEEP writers room

Comics retailing legend Greg Ketter standing up to ICE in Minneapolis. Yes, that's tear gas. He's 70 years old.

FIFA and the US deserve each other.

Hijack season 2

I always used to buy a single $1 lottery ticket per week. I was so sure I wouldn’t win, sometimes I’d forget to check the numbers. It was all about enabling the fantasy.

A Scientific Breakthrough Has Unveiled the Ancient Source of Our Pain Cutting-edge genetics research reveals a startling legacy embedded in our DNA.

High school crushes who never felt the same way I bet

www.popularmechanics.com/science/a699...

For me the inflection point wasn’t Trump but Mitch McConnell refusing to confirm Merrick Garland.

January 2016 / January 2026

Real and virtual snow combining in Amsterdam. (Thanks @simonbs.dev for the Festivitas app!)

"megachurches are shen yun for white people" is an incredible and damning true statement

in the pit

This entire weekend

30 Rock meme but with Counting Crows

This came to me in a dream

weirdo @JackPosobiec reacts to netflix possibly buying warner bros: “They're going to make Looney Tunes gay They're going to make everything gay”

bugs bunny was literally the first guy in drag i ever saw but ok

hillary clinton doesn't get a lot of love on this site but let's never forget she took odo's virginity with such gentleness and skill that they made a baseball card out of it

Can you at least give them poor grades / fail them? Or is there pressure to hand out B’s and A’s no matter what?