Imagine putting those words in that order and thinking you've said something informative or profound.

Alex Jones really is the metastasis of the tumor that was Limbaugh.

So you're leasing the brand for up to a year? What happens after that?

We're headed for the Dark Times, people!

Wow, what a great idea!

And this "continuous expulsion" has zero downsides, right? It doesn't pollute, or contribute to global warming? It doesn't create a global reliance on the whims of a handful of countries who might decide to start wars and increase the cost of these liquid batteries?

Early 90's is The Sign by Ace of Base.

Late 90's is Tubthumping by Chumbawamba.

Correct, and that's absolutely wild.

Everyone's cancer cells are necessarily specific to them, so tumor cells are needed to make a vaccine specifically for each patient.

In essence, you're not getting vaxxed from never having pancreatic cancer; you're getting vaxxed to prevent it from returning.

The issue is that symptoms of pancreatic cancer don't usually present until it's really advanced. By the time you notice something is wrong and get a diagnosis, it's almost always too late.

The five-year survival rate for the most common pancreatic cancer is about 5%.

A guy teaching a 1A class who doesn't know the difference between being punished for holding a belief, and being punished for acting on those beliefs?

Wherever he's teaching is doing a disservice to its students.

Depends if it gets that far.

"Referring it to the DoJ" just means someone thinks there's evidence of a crime. The DoJ then has to get an indictment from a grand jury, which then leads to an arrest, trial, and possible conviction.

Trump's DoJ has been doing, uh... poorly in securing indictments.

First Panel: Maria Bartiromo asks, "You think Thom Tillis is gonna give you a vote?" Second Panel: Donald Trump says "He might not, but that's why Thom Tillis is no longer a Senator." Third Panel: Bartiromo having yet another realization that her paycheck depends on defending this complete dumbfuck idiot. She also is beginning to wonder if she has any self-respect left. Fourth Panel: Trump asks, "Thom Tillis is no longer a Senator, right?" All the images are taken from a real interview Trump gave to Bartiromo in mid April 2026.

Quick and dirty

She didn't care about the rape, or the sexual assaults, or the racism, or the obvious grifting, or the greed, or the lying, or the infidelity, or the treason.

She can miss me with her performative offense.

She tied for 5th place at a swim meet with an athlete who is a trans woman and decided to make that everyone else's problem.

TAKE A BULLET FOR YOU, BABE!

I have no idea who Allen or Harris are, but Nick Sortor and Allie Beth Stuckey are well known in the right-wing grift space. Sortor has been on InfoWars multiple times and ABS does the whole "Jesus girlie" influencer thing.

Well you've got part of your wish, since Gonzalez announced he's quitting too.

Trump is not the Antichrist nor demon-possessed, because those things don't exist.

He's a malignant narcissist with a lifetime of wealth, freedom from consequences, an amount of power unmatched by anything save his own dementia, and a party willing to protect him at all costs.

Imagine whining about political violence, without a single thought about why political violence is happening.

Pro tip: if people are attacking the symbols of capitalism it's probably because they see capitalism as their oppressor, and capitalists should probably take note.

To be fair, pudding for brains can't count that high.

I suspect until CU is trashed (or the US just falls apart) every election for the rest of our lives will be "record-setting".

"Every streamer that is t Netflix is operating at a MASSIVE loss..."

Dropout sounds like it's doing okay, given that they profit-share with their employees.

They don't care that he's insane, because he was before.

They care that his insanity might finally cut into their grift.

Do you remember in The Lion King when scar told the hyenas if they helped him become king he will make their lives better and then their lives didn’t get better and he blamed them for it.

And upon realizing this, the hyenas ate him.

Do with that story what you will.

Except for when he visits the Oval Office.

Shouldn't that read "Die Republikaner sind ein Naziproblem"?

You gotta love that "Biden is at WR" picture is clearly not even US traffic.

Millions of people start reaching for that one bottle, just in case...

She does, and anyone who puts their name to *that* opinion piece deserves the exact same level of scorn and humiliation.

Calling everyone who tries to work together to stand up for their rights "communists" is the exact rhetoric you hear on Ben Shapiro's Daily Liar.

The Samsung Galaxy Note 7 was the "You're using it wro- OH MY GOD IT'S ON FIRE!"