thing about ai imagery, video, audio, text or whatever is it all looks like it’s done by the same person, somebody who likes their polished turd finished with a rocket powered shit shovel and techs trying to flog it as the new fashion

metaphor, proverb and a phrase walk into an idiom. non sequitur asks, “are you ready to format?”

metaphor says, “i’ll have a reason, analogy and a suggestion, please.”

nu earth, who dishonour?

nothing on the impartialitelly except for the bbc news

Judging by the flotsam and jetsam it looks like i got home last night by gravitational wave

having a dramatical stance and entrance by kicking doors down on arrival and tearing roofs off on exit is costing a fortune in repairs

I’m not gonna argue with anyone who’s got 3 payments left to pay on their trainers.

The french version of google is called le goog

Meal prep is just cooking a bunch of leftovers.

My watch gaslighting me to stand up as soon as I sit down to take a shit … is some bullshit.

My first crush was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Blonde has always looked good on me.

it’s exhausting to seemingly be the only person in your daily life to give a shit about fuck

Bluesky servers are now referred to as waiters

subwoofers are subtitles as dictated by dogs this interview is over

there's only one direction to head in when you see someone you know while out shopping and that is any other fucking direction possible

At least this plate of wings thought I was a total badass.

i think i heard a brain cell scream before it died

[20-minute power interruption]

My back:

My investigative documentary series was picked up by Pornhub. It revolves around men sleeping on public transportation and female demons removing men'slife force.

It's called "The Suck You Bus"

It's a superstition in Louisiana if an alligator crawls under your house a family member will soon die. When I was 7 an alligator crawled under my grandparents' house and my grandma told my grandpa to go shoo it away. That's when knew I was being raised amongst dumbasses.

Going out in the woods and asking a great horned owl, “Excuse me, do you work here?”

Progressing to the next stage of our relationship. Exorcism.

The worst part of this rainy weather is it gives the moon cloud cover while it hunts you.

before we go any further you should know I have this tendency for pondering and cogitation

Overheard in the office: "you are worth a Wagon Wheel"

Imagine being cured and awakened after being cryogenically preserved, only to need to have bits lopped of you due to freezer burn?

Bummer.

A jacket potato is not the same as a potato jacket. I know this now. But I'm still gonna put some sour cream and cheese in the pockets.

I filed my nails. Under "lost causes".

worrying about what things I’m gonna worry about in the future cuz my worries have worries