It'll be quantitative physics and golden showers coursework a-go-go.

Morning.
That's the children off to school, to do some numeracy and watch some KS2 choke fucking videos. 🥲

I agree. The person that's strongly disagreeing with you and bandying about terms like 'choke fucking' and 'male privilege' has me blocked, but as a female, and a mother - I agree with you.

Sorry to hear that, Michael xx

See - Dunkirk. Obviously Scottish.

Quote with a pic of you in glasses.

Your Momma

Your mum at every bleep up !

Newborn giraffe hasn't grown into his neck yet 🥹

Ice cream and farts?

"you look like Sophie Dahl when she was fat" 🥲

I was going to make a comment about my holes, but I'm absolutely above that 👀

WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?!

Now if the Jazzle was a white chocolate one, I'd be having that. In this instance, I'll go fizzy cola bottle 👌🏼

Schools should introduce Northern Soul dancing as part of the national syllabus.

Buying babies and toddlers £60+ branded trainers is a brilliant investment.

Come out of that bush Gem. JoJo, go stand in the corner.

I was replying to JoJo - she's one of those misguided fridgers

It doesn't need storing in the fridge!!! Something about the acidity of the tomato and vinegar if I remember rightly.

He has had a good nose at Toby's presents and eaten many chocolate. Can't complain.

9 whole years of Crotch Goblin 1.0 today 🎈

Bad blood between me and Billy. Bad blood.

5 luncheon meats to get to know me by

Princes Pork Luncheon Meat
Pek GOLD
Spam
Pek
ASDA value range pork luncheon meat

Can I enquire as to what E.T's doing in your back garden?

Fucker Has Nerve To Be 22 Years Old

Fucker Has Nerve To Be 22 Years Old

It's the last one with them both watching the ultrasound scan monitor. I can almost hear their medical background mum yelling "you pair of pricks better not be messing about with the ultrasound probe again!"

Why though?!

I saw one of them doing an experiment yesterday, where he drank loads of water, did an ultrasound of his bladder, then he had a piss ON CAMERA with a screen that covered his bottom half then did another scan after and I was SO uncomfortable watching him looking at his dick as he pissed ON CAMERA.

It's Dr Xand (or zarrrrnd as the posh twats say it)