Him and Adorno!

Let me tell you a story. When I was a child, I suffered from night terrors. It was always the same dream: I could hear my family and neighbors wailing in the street outside as they were pursued and then destroyed by a nameless malevolent force, something neither I nor anyone else could control, a great darkness that was, somehow, all my fault. Today, that childhood dream is finally coming true. Today I can finally say the sweetest nine or 10 words in the English language: Global Tetrahedron has completed its plan to control InfoWars.com. I’ve had a lot of time to think about InfoWars in the last year and a half. As the seasons have changed, my ambitions for the project have grown grander, crueler, better aligned with market data. Come, friends, and imagine with me…

Imagine a roaring arena packed to the rafters with pathological liars. High above you in the nosebleeds are podcasters, screaming that you’ll die if you don’t buy their skincare products. Below, on the floor, imagine demonic battalions of super-influencers physically forcing people into home fitness devices designed to dismantle their bodies bone by bone and reassemble them into a grotesque statue of yourself. Out of the throngs, an extremely sick looking man approaches you. He puts his hands on your shoulders. He explains that he is your life coach and that you owe him $800. Such is the InfoWars I envision: An infinite virtual surface teeming with ads. Not just ads, but scams! Not just scams, but lies with no object, free radical misinformation, sentences and images so poorly thought out that they are unhealthy even to view for just a few seconds. The InfoWars of old was only the prototype for the hell I know we can build together: A digital platform where, every day, visitors sacrifice themselves at altars of delusion and misery, their minds fully disintegrating on contact.

With this new InfoWars, we will democratize psychological torture, welcoming brutal and sadistic ideas from everyone, even the very stupidest among us. It will be like the Manhattan Project, only instead of a bomb, we will be building a website. The InfoWars of tomorrow will converge into a swirling vortex of content about content, talent acquiring talent, rings of concentric media mergers processing all human artistry into one endlessly digestible slurry. This will be a dank, sunless place, one where panic and capital feed on each other like twins in the womb of a hulking, unknowable monster—a monster known by many names, but which I like to call modern-day America. All of this is to say that I believe in us. I believe that with the new InfoWars, we can alchemize the pioneering spirit of amateur inquiry, the profit-maximizing drive of corporations, and the cold mental clarity that comes only with disciplined daily ingestion of mind- and body-altering chemicals. If we can do that, what other great things can we do together?

I don’t yet know, but I’m excited to find out. Welcome home, warriors. The future belongs to us. We’re writing the story now. It’s going to be a long one, and it’s going to be a bad one. So settle in. Make yourself comfortable. Buy a tote bag. Nothing can stop us now that we’re in charge of a website. Infinite Growth Forever, Bryce Tetraeder, CEO, Global Tetrahedron

We have a deal. theonion.com/at-long-last...

At Long Last, InfoWars Is Ours By Bryce P. Tetraeder, CEO, Global Tetrahedron

We have a deal. theonion.com/at-long-last...

Sir. I believe this belongs to you. The Mouse has it in Florida.

@dicknixon.bsky.social

Always meet your heroes.

Spaceship Earth is down, Phoenicians remain unthanked.

Their spirits will grow restless and demand a sacrifice.

Me, smug, being affirmed -by the Bishop of Rome - that Baudrillard is the Christian philosopher of our time.

My tell is jumping up in the middle of the sermon and shouting “NO POPERY!” in my best Ian Paisley voice.

My man is going to be absolutely chundered when he discovers the politics of the Anglo-Catholic movement.

Fr. Isaac Bradshaw | Substack Of no great social or political import, just trying to do right by others and Jesus.

My Substack: substack.com/@downeastpri...

So anyway, off to thank the Phoenicians.

“We all have an Eric Mascall shaped hole in heart.”

It’s good, actually, for an FBI director to spend his working day [redacted]-talking on Twitter. It’s means there’s no crime to crimefight.

Seriously this slaps. What’s a matter with you people?!

m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ex9A...

The erasure of Treasure Planet from the Disney oeuvre is Stalinist in scope. Jim deserves better.

A friend once described the Greens as Radical YISEBYs - “Yes In Someone Else’s Back Yard.”

“Will write strongly worded letter to the editor if hostilities continue.”

'Baby Jessica' Arrested in Texas, Charged With Assault Jessica McClure Morales -- who shot to fame as "Baby Jessica" way back in 1987 after being rescued from a deep well when she was 18 months old -- was arrested in Texas following an alleged domestic di...

Well, well, well… What have we here…

www.tmz.com/2026/04/14/b...

bsky.app/profile/isaa...

Gino Bulso sponsoring another Lawyer Full Employment Act.

Well. A lot of words there.

Has anyone checked on Rod?

Nota bene please do not actually post Rod on my timeline.

Worth remembering that 1969 - the year we landed in the moon the first time - saw the highest number of US servicemen in Vietnam of the entire conflict.

There’s lots of words there.

He still has his uses.

bsky.app/profile/isaa...

BLOUNT COUNTY, TN…

#NoKings

From @michaelabfortn: www.instagram.com/reel/DWbywyQ...

I’ve been playing Ace Combat again, and this reads like the AWACS guy at the beginning of the last mission.

The Don Draper one gets me - Draper would’ve thought Trump vulgar and beneath contempt.