and willingness on the part of the friends

yes. a close friend who I want to live near

i am trying to figure it out lol

this has been a fear of mine for a while. It's scary to know there's no one in my life who has to check in on me.

gallstones may not have killed me and i'm sure that i would have gone to the hospital on my own after like, a couple hours of vomiting due to severe abdominal pain, but i still would have waited a lot longer than i would have if not for my roommate, who was appropriately worried

saw a post postulating that the reason married people are healthier is because they have someone to check in on them, drive them to the hospital, affirm when their symptoms are bad enough to be worth seeing a doctor, and i am newly terrified of living alone

basically if driving is the fastest way to get somewhere within city limits then you fucked up

i don't necessarily think it should be impossible to drive in a city, but i do think it should be impossible to drive *fast*

just drove like 30-45 minutes (or more) out of my way to try and get a particular seltzer i like from a liquor store

only to realize upon arrival that the location i was driving to was a *restaurant/bar* that happens to stock it *for customers* rip me

literally why do i not live in chicago

federal return is free, state is $15, but it's worth it

here you go www.freetaxusa.com?friend=tSSbhB

do you want my referral link for freetaxusa so i can be entered into a drawing for $20k

you know those "HOW'S MY DRIVING" signs on trucks with a phone number?

i need one that goes

HOW'S MY DRIVING?
CALL: your senator.
tell them to fund better trains.

DON'T BE, I'm glad someone was entertained lolol

this isn't nearly as bad, though, as the girl from summer camp who liked to hold my hand, and in my mind i was just like "if she wants to do that it's fine idk why handholding is considered inherently romantic anyway"

i stand by the sentiment in general but in context she def had a crush on me

when i was in high school a guy i was sort of friends with and who i had been sending some very long messages back and forth with for a couple months bought me one of those chocolate bars with a love poem on the wrapper for my birthday and i was just like "huh, weird"

I figured as much

they had the gall to ignore all my jokes,

oh, so probably not frustrated with the assignment, then

if the fact that i was punning in the twelve hours of severe pain leading up to my emergency gall bladder surgery is any indication.

none of the nurses or doctors laughed, it was disappointing

watching the pitt for the first time, i'm on episode 3, and i regret to inform you that if i was the one who was stabbed with a nail i would probably have been the one who made the "nailed it" joke

i retrieved the fishing pole to play with the cat and he's still trying to attack my toes how do i fix this

unfortunately i'm doing precisely the opposite (watching a mediocre rom com)

wow i would love to stop getting ads for "femboy fitness: we'll help you lose weight and look more femme" on facebook

friendships of convenience were the bane of my existence when i was in high school/college but now that I'm an adult i think they might be the best thing ever

fair

Why did the White House just post this on Instagram?

so we're also living in a horror movie now, got it

you have to have so much trust built up to make that work with someone, and the logistics often just don't line up