“I mean, I am different from other Spider folks, don’t call myself Spider-Man or dress in red and blue and I get called Legally Distinct Spider-Man.

Yeah. That’s real funny.”

“Imagine a room full of wise cracking quipping Spider people making a line up to roast you.”

“Just don’t build your own MJ. I have a feeling if other Spider People heard that, they wouldn’t let you live it down.”

“That sounds very original”

“She died because I failed to save her and was resurrected as a bloodthirsty killer.”

“This Gwen reminds me of my ex.”

“I wonder if anyone annoys the hero named Boom Boom with that one song.”

“Vulturess. Kleptomaniac daughter of an electric powered CEO who was out for revenge and has a bit of a love hate relationship with me.

It’s complicated.”

“God. Reminds me The Vulturess wanted to kiss me.

Granted, she also blamed me for the death of her father, so it was a complex relationship.”

“Plus, we can hang upside down.”

“Who doesn’t have a thing for Spider people? We’re pretty sexy.”

“Geez, Superlady. Chill! I won’t web ya unless you go all evil on me.

At most you seem mostly bothered right now.”

“Oh but you wouldn’t laser little ol’ me for getting web in your hair.

…I mean if I got it in your eyes, maybe. Or mouth…

I do carry a dissolvent with me just in case.

…and besides, you can just rip all that off.”

he stares at her and then stares at his wrist, debating something

“……No. Too easy. Funny, but too easy.”

“What are spiders gonna do? Get their web in your hair?”

“That’s offensive. I’m pretty sure there are several things more frightening.

Like…vampires.”

“Man. Why do you hate spiders?”

At the very least, you’re a queen of culture, it seems

Hatsune Miku, is that you?

I am not a clone. I’m a variant.

I hear you guys have to deal enough with clones

My Arachnid Alarms!

You know. One time with the whole A on my chest and the fact that the media thinks I’ve had too many lovers, they said I was an Easy A.

My…ex girlfriend thought it was funny.

Family: Aunt Peggy (deceased), Aunt Jemima (deceased), Thomas T. Thompson (former foster parent)

Affiliation: Guardians of the Globe (briefly), Spider-Society

Don’t worry. There is no hyphen between Agent and Spider.

Some still pronounce it as Agent-Spider though. I can hear it

Something else I learned interacting with other Spiders?

We all have a tendency to have our ankles grabbed

Not an inaccurate statement though

Hey! Never ask a spider about his tingle!

// SCREAMS

// testing 123

Okay. So from what I’ve learned, Spider-People have horrible luck. Kryptonians have harems. Bat people live in their own reality tv show with not the greatest father.

And somewhere in space there is a raccoon yelling at his captain