Life guide

If I’m reading an ‘article’ online, I close it the instant I get to a spelling mistake.

Hugs and head scritches to Za

Headline: Carbon price would cost Alberta oilsands a Timbit per barrel: climate group

New Canadian measuring standard just dropped

Human brain cells on a chip learned to play Doom in a week

Ummm excuse me good sir, but WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK are you doing with mixing human brains with tech and teaching them to kill?

I’m not falling for this a second time.

🤞🏼☮️❤️

Ghost blu-ray vs. ghost blew Ray

What is the difference between these two photos?

(trick question they’re the same photo)

🫂☮️

When is Easter? I’m almost out of discount chocolate I stocked up on on Feb 15th

The Gen X urge to taunt you a second time

If you see this, quote post with your sexiest selfie

Why do I feel like @buckyisotope.bsky.social wrote his quote?

I’m glad Prime video is giving the newer generations the thrill of quiet tv shows with thunderously loud sudden commercials breaking their bass speakers.

My pussy totally gets wet enough so if I ask you to spit on it, it is just for the disrespect

Mmmm bacon.

And cheese…

Oo! And burgers… mmmm

Matthew means “God took your right sock”

Mmmm flavour country

me: can i borrow your car?

friend: you already borrowed my car

me: *nervously* can I borrow another one?

Holy fuck dude. I’m so sorry. 🫂❤️☮️

Whoever stole my antidepressants,

I hope you're happy.

I showed my tweets to my mom. She scrolled through like 45 blowjob tweets and didn’t blink. Then she got to one about licking a guy’s butt and she said, “Did you have to make it nasty?”

What was it he said that got everyone so upset? "Be kind to each other." Oh, yeah. That'll do it.

No new pictures, where are you mentally

me as a Bluesky therapist

Me: by emotionally stable, does being numb count?
Friends: No
Me: shit

Men will read this and then say “Fine. I’ll shower.”

hello yes i would like a shitty person to experience a consequence?

idk man fucking any of them surprise me

yes i'll hold

My lifelong review of anything I ever did was “Half assed”. I feel this in my bones. 🫂☮️