I thought about this again

Absolutely obsessed with this description of a Christmas tree sold by Target.

For those of us ready to watch in awe/confusion/concern at Elon's Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), join me right here on the Bluesky Teehee! Consortium (BTC) for live reporting on whatever the hell is happening in this timeline

I am once again attempting to make people laugh with the funniest thing I've ever posted on this app, given that Bluesky has had a huge influx of users recently

Once again bringing back the funniest thing I've ever said on this platform

Bringing back the funniest thing I've ever said, that was also never appreciated.

Bringing back the funniest thing I've ever said, that was also never appreciated.

This was the funniest thing I've ever said or done and literally not one person appreciated it :(

A screenshot of the banner of Burger King on Uber Eats. One of the burgers is situated next to a call out bubble that says "Italian is back!"

when Mario still has an extra life and starts back at the last save point

These takes are just getting silly now. bluesky is antipope anacletus II. threads is the 9M14 Malyutka anti-tank guided missile system. Twitter is a little fruit cart vendor on the side of the road in 1907. No, these are websites

Nothing in Alanis Morisette's hit song Ironic is actually ironic.

Each item she lists is just the result of poor risk management.

a screenshot of Bluesky’s web app colored pink

oh no the Barbie marketing team has hit bluesky

thank goodness for my consistently poor quality posts

Hey Bluesky, what do you call the stuff you put in a sandwich?

I called it "the innards", but that feels wrong...

oops found a device with Twitter on it

Happy New York Daytime.

In my hands is a signed launch day Xbox 360. Looking up, Bill Gates is smiling at me. Everybody in Best Buy is smiling.

I take off my Apple Vision. I am back in the retirement home. Nobody has visited me for 16 years. I put it back on.

I hug the Xbox 360. Everybody in Best Buy is smiling

- Olivia Rodrigo

déjà vu

Ok Josey

Welcome to Bluesky, @officialmatt.bsky.social!! Finally used my second invite for great good

T-Shirt showing a venn diagram with two overlapping circles: One Direction, and War Crimes. The centre overlap contains just a single question mark.

This T-Shirt was posted alongside a Tweet in which the author asked "can someone solve this?"

Golly, I do believe I have!

Inflicting Payne.

I'll see myself out...

A not at all suspicious horse-shaped item trussed up under a large cloth

Some Greek guys just dropped this off, said it was a gift. Psyched to see what it is once I get it behind my city’s famously impenetrable wall

The right type of gatekeeping.

Mild fever, headaches, stomach pains, and multiple clear COVID tests. I guess I have one of those other legacy illnesses from a bygone era.

It's the £50 Amazon gift card of the Internet

Having an invite code feels like when someone says "buy yourself a gift from me".

So much power. So many possibilities. Nothing gets done.

we got most of the things you want and you can file backorders with me