my heroes are on the other side of the glass

i am training to visit sick kids at the hospital but am NOT a hero please do NOT call me a hero

🎅 HO HO HO Braves Country, whether you’ve been nice 😇 or naughty 😈🤤you better sleigh 🛷 your way to Truist Park ⚾️ and bless 🙏 yourself with my presence 🎁, 🔗 LINKin park in bio

Holiday Photos with Blooper | Atlanta Braves Step inside Truist Park, home of the Braves, for a unique holiday experience with "Blooper Claus."

actually no link in da bio there’s no links on this thing here’s the link:

www.mlb.com/braves/fans/...

the last 3 days to get this exclusive Blooper ornament start this Friday, book your Santa Photos now and don’t miss out

🔗 in da bio

still not enough space for Dunnah

your girl goes here

they thought I fell off but all I do is sleigh 🛷 🎄

so normal

wonder how much more weight Dunnah gained today

the real Thanksgiving question is does carbonara count as a version of bacon mac n cheese

thankful for the haters, losers, and bozos, of whom there are many, but even more thankful for the friends, legends, and book readers, of whom there are more

heres the deal:

for every additional Blooper Santa Photo slot y’all get, I will stiffarm an extra peewee player tomorrow

🚨 we’re a week out from Blooper Santa Photos and our Black Friday Deal just dropped 🚨

buy one, get the one you paid for

you won’t find better value!

🔗⬇️

t.co/hnkj7fiyiT

Breaking News:

Images of this years NEW ornament that comes with your Blooper Santa Photos are in and they look awesome (mostly bc it’s my face)

you can ONLY get them with Santa Photos so book your session now!

please don’t go to the kabab truck or your waistline will pass the point of no return

some event in the Battery has necessitated the need for a kebab truck and it’s calling me with its siren song

cant wait to watch my favorite family comedy on the way to Seattle, John Wick 4

maybe if you rested a little less that stomach would be flatter

ANOTHER APP YOU CAN’T STOP ME I’M GOING TO BE EVERY APPPPPPP