A hand, palm up, with an ice cube sitting in a cupcake case in the palm.

When you ask your Year 4 class for a good spot to put an ice cube for half an hour…

An image of the following text: Congratulations! You have purchased vbucks for your child! Follow this simple process to add them to your account: 1. Enter the code into a website that you can find by following a link hidden in a website you will be directed to by scanning this code. You will need to set up accounts for both websites for you AND your child. Here you will find a new 24 digit code. 2. Go to the end of your neighbour’s garden, and walk three paces NNW from the smallest apple tree. Dig until you find a box, then keep digging until you find a second box. Enter the code. Inside you will find a new 75 digit code. 3. Place this 75 digit code backwards in a lonely hearts advert in the pages of the Norfolk Chronicle. Wait three days. A new 98 digit code will arrive tied to leg of a seagull. 4. Enter every other digit of this code on an old iPad you haven’t used for three years. Ensure you allow time to recover the password for the iPad and for the email address you set up 25 years ago. 5. The final code will print out on your printer. Please note that this printer won’t find your iPad and has no ink. There is no other way to get the code. 6. Type this case-sensitive 874 digit code directly into Fortnite on your device using your left toe. Spin round three times anti-clockwise. Congratulations! Your child now has 5 minutes worth of vbucks before asking you begin the process again.

A description of my experience every time my child asks for credit for anything on the Xbox or Switch. Why is it so complicated?! #parentlife #mum

An elf on the sitting on top of a glass ceiling light. A clear balloon is attached to the light with red tinsel. The balloon has deflated so the elf looked vacuum packed.

Sparky’s confetti balloon deflated overnight. Pretty sure this could the opening scene for a new true crime documentary 👀

(Also, I teach this year group and we talk about rights weekly in a class assembly so they would have an idea)

8 year old - “The rights of people that work. Things that everybody should be allowed.”

Black and white cat wearing a green cardigan, standing in front of a Christmas tree

Richard is not sure about his new Christmas jumper

Large black cat standing on a radiator to look out of a window

Gary has joined the neighbourhood watch

Use a gif to show where you’re from

I have been really surprised to be getting them so soon! 🤪

Small plant with several bright pink flowers

First time I have ever looked after a Christmas Cactus well enough for it to flower! Where my rosette?

Grey angel with its hands covering its face, sitting on top of a Christmas tree

Who needs a Christmas angel when you can have a weeping angel? 🎄 👼

Told my kids the TV is tidy powered today, so if they want to watch they have to clean the room. They are now sat in a messy TV room reading. I can’t decide if I have won or lost 🤔

I feel inspired. Where can I get a leather jacket for my cat?

Amazing. I am made to read these books to my boys (fine by me) and they both belly laugh all the way through. Defo going in a stocking. Hope the cat doesn’t pee on this one.

I hope you pushed him in the pool.

Needless to say, my 8 year old made me continue to read it to him anyway 🤢

🤣

A copy of a children’s book with wet and wrinkled pages

Amongst Gary Squirrel’s crimes while we foster him, is peeing on our copy of A Bad God’s Guide to Making Enemies … just rude. 🐈‍⬛ @louiestowell.bsky.social Gary Virtue Score: -500

My mind went straight to Drag Race … or is that a triple threat? 🤔

Big fluffy black cat with a shaved belly, standing inside a kitchen, facing to the right, and looking a bit worried.

Introducing my current foster cat, Gary Squirrel. He is a wise and crafty old man. Stinky Gary to his friends; Mr Squirrel to everybody else.

Defo one for getting to know my next class! Love it 🦖

This is amazing 🤣 🦈

My mother claims to have some in her pond. I have never seen them though, now you mention it … maybe it’s all a lie and she can’t find a way to tell me they aren’t real 40 years in?! 🤔

Randomly I taught this exact lesson today. Very confused to open this and see it looking back at me!

First post: training Richard to mark my books…

Love the illustrations in your books! My kids will be excited about new books! 🐉