Hey people who still go door to door selling stuff? Are you okay?

[Walking into the bank]

I see debt people

Orange tabby cat with a stern expression in a cozy living room. Transcribed Text: Me, waiting for my turn to speak, but the topic's already changed.

Tuesday

Since my last update my eyes look like a slot machine when I'm dissociating

*wears giant headphones all day connected to bluetooth even though nothing is playing*

Wanna find heart shaped rocks and throw them at each other..affectionately.

Flavor Flav is short for Flavorful Riboflavin

Hear me out, a drive-thru sperm bank called 𝘌𝘢𝘴𝘺 𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘦, 𝘌𝘢𝘴𝘺 𝘎𝘰.

It’s days like these I wish my dog could pet me back.

One of their best songs 🤌🏼

working on my beached body (like a whale)

[car accident]

Stand back, everyone. I’m no doctor but I have a box of Band-Aids®️ containing every size they make.

Fridge full.
Nothing to eat.
Again.

A closeup image of a crescent moon in the shape of a smile

the moon out here smiling at me tonight

choose your own adventure but it’s me choosing songs

rearranging the hideaway in my mind to make room for more floor cushions and cheese snacks

sure telling someone how you feel is great but have you ever had your honesty held with care

(snuggling with my cat when she gets a look in her eye) are you about to bite me

cat: prrhaps

I date people who are messy because dumpster fires are hot

That’s gonna leave a question mark.

Why face the music when I can just listen to it.

Some connections stay in your heart long after they’re gone

They're totally cousins, I think they look so alike 😂 def therapist vibes

Thanks Mark!

if you love it so much why don’t you marry juana

No thanks, "activewear," you sound exhausting.

The energy between us is orange cat.

life passing me by sounds pretty good right now

I hope my new therapist thinks I'm funny, which is the most important thing in therapy

I have threatened to fight so many people over the years

Number of fights I’ve been in: 0