Plants are as thirsty as I am on #HumpDay

Baby, I’ve got bad news. There’s blood in my mouth cus I’ve been biting my tounge all week.

On or off? The #mcm Big Light is broken.

Mission Accomplished. Cozy day complete. Wanna snuggle up to Dad’s #hairy chest til #scs is over?

Barely survived the week of tornados but we’re back in the 30s this morning. #SCS is gonna be a cozy one today.

Booyah! Glute’n morgen, meine freunde!

Please don’t perceive me auf Deutsch. That’s all I remember from a college German.

What’s the word for #HumpDay over there?

Bavarian cream donut?

Dang. I didn’t think of either of those!

Oh balls. I almost forgot it was #TesticleTuesday.

I’m already hungry for #HumpDay and got dickstracted.

Thunderstorms always make me horny as hell. Happy #toesday anyway.

One year later, and I’d say divorce looks pretty darn good on me.

Be gentle today, dear readers. The world is ending.

The floppy #softie relaxes near the Otro Otter, appeased by a morning #scs BoySnack rump hump.

Find something soft to snuggle up to this spring, only at Sears.

Good morning gays of the internet, this is what #fcf did to your favorite Staff Dad before work.

I know it’s Saturday and we’re supposed to be soft or something, but cum on!

Is it weird that the pillow is watching?

May the odds be ever in your favor this #scs

Please do not percieve the Otroverted Otter during Austistic Nesting cycles on #fcf, #scf, #mcm and #fursday.

Viewing available on various platforms throughout the exhibit, allowing easy access to all angles of the Otroverted Otter.

Come see the fuzzy side of SEARS. 🦦

DopamineFurnace.org

From the darkest depths of the internet, the #fcf Fat Cock Parade is just getting started.

Wave those cocks proudly, fellas. It’s #fatcockfriday in the end times.

Is it normal to feel so fucking horny at 43? This Dad’s hole is always twitching. #HumpDay doesn’t help.

Got the solution, kid, or do I have to take care of it myself?

You can’t be self-aware that you’re annoying AND a prick at the same time.

Coolness stands.

So does my prick.

Definitely cool. Dig the contrasting stripes against the unique jacket color

Do you feel like an insufferable prick?

Woof! All that horny gym time is paying off handsome.

Woof!

✋🏻🛑this is a pit stop! 🛑✋🏻

Quote with your pit pics 💪🏼

a man wearing a purple hat and sunglasses is wearing a pink and green shirt ALT: a man wearing a purple hat and sunglasses is wearing a pink and green shirt

I get it. It’s almost like you’ve got a pocket gay doing a little shimmy in your jock

a man wearing a black and gold shirt stands in front of a crowd ALT: a man wearing a black and gold shirt stands in front of a crowd

Oh my stars. That’s a bush I could get lost in.

We mustn’t dwell. Not today. Not on BlueSky #HumpDay.

Say no more, mon amor. Shock me, shock me, shock me with that deviant behavior instead.

Damn the man. It’s #RexManningDay.

What are you staring at, boy?

You think Dad’s sack is gonna lick itself? Get in there.

Good boy.

Hard legs and a floppy dick because #fcs + #scs = #mcm, duh.

Criss Cross Applesauce. Why don’t you show me who’s boss?

Welcome to another week, people of the internet. May all your Yums go unyucked this week.

What’s your Yum?

#MonochromeMonday #mcm #kinkpositive

Dad has risen.

I’ve heard rumors of a zombie trying to save the world. Best make it a #softiesunday and stay indoors today, kid.

Later I’ll show you the miracle of turning #softcock into #hardcock

Another week. Another #FatCockFriday.

It’s the end of the world as we know it and #fcf is the only thing that makes me feel fine.

Is this real life?

I think the thong speaks for itself here.

Thanks handsome! Always appreciate you dropping by.

Bio Break! Are you staying hydrated?

Good boy.