pixelated herring

me (about to remortgage at historic low interest rates for the next 10 years): i cant believe my luck
trump, whose tweets seem to control every financial insitution on earth for some reason: mortgages, are gay. they should be more expsensive

blew the horn of gondor and a boiled egg came out

the image of my 3kg psylium husk order is too powerful and has become a black cube

*slaps digestive tract* this bad boy can fit so much shit

we're not supposed to talk about Shit Club

happy valentines day. i bought you a rotisserie chicken

i asked chatgpt to generate a dril tier tweet and my computer turned off

any time anyone stops me from doing anything: open the fuckin' strait!!!!

Could an empire in decline do THIS? *launches deeply unpopular invasion cementing status as lunatic-led pariah state, its not clear what kind of move i was trying to do*

EXCELLENT TROLLING SIR,

master has given dobby a glock

if It Hapens on easter weekend i am fully gouing to lose it chat

porn is getting weird

chatgpt is a soyboy beta cuck

ive been saying this

is this roko's basilisk

turns out you can actually just stop oil

just imagined an world with no america and almost cried with conceptual beauty

my tinder bio specifically says NO EGGS and yet here we are another inbox full of egg pictures

this woman could stop a panzer tank

🎶 that's me: the corner

that's me in the spotlight (i'm a corner) 🎶

captcha: prove that you are a human
me: [writes a sonnet so beautiful it causes you to question the nature of the human condition]

(6 seconds after becoming an american citizen) does the 2nd amendment cover flame throwers

hilary clinton voice: why dont you pokemon GO to your nearest military installation and be sure to take lots of pictures. of pokemon

its 19:30 on a tuesday night people and you know what that means.

time to hit the weaving subreddit and call everyone a cuck

jigsaw: i want to play a game
me:
jigsaw: there is a button in front of you - every time you pr
me: (already hammering the button) what does it do

breaking: the one (1) robotic cop has been joined by one (1) guy dressed as a bat. soon we'll have negative crime statistics

its okay everyone, we have released one (1) robotic cop who moves extremely slowly to cover the whole of detroit. crime is vanquished