Not knowing what the worst people in the world were thinking every fucking day

And that's enough Twitter for now

This is why when people bang on about houses as investments it’s nonsense; a house should be your home and it’s only worth as much as the next person is willing to pay for it.

ON DOUBLE GAME WEEK ON FPL FFS

Yeah that will solve all of our problems…..

BIG HELPS 😂

Prince - Sign O' The Times (Official Music Video) YouTube video by Prince

10 years gone.

youtu.be/8EdxM72EZ94?...

Would immediately buy the mid-century novel that began with this sentence.

I bet. Glad you’re better!

Oh not the bronchitis again! I hope you’re recovering.

Getting another piercing in my nose has really saved me from hayfever this season, as I have to spray saline up it twice a day, so nothing is sticking. What a life hack.

The Onion has successfully acquired Alex Jones’ ‘Infowars’ after 17 months of legal battles and has debuted its new logo.

It will be turned into a parody of itself, with the support of the Sandy Hook families.

We are not angry enough, to be honest. Seb better start bracing himself for it to start feeling a lot worse.

Narrator: in fact, he had quite a lot of cards.

What’s with the massive delivery windows? Mine are always an hour.

According to video recordings, when a ship tries to pass through the strait of Hormuz, Iranian navy says: “The Strait of Hormuz is still closed. We will open it by the order of our leader Imam Khamenei, not by the tweets of some idiot.”

Interview with Nigel Farage: "Donald Trump or JD Vance? That's a difficult one because I've known Vance even longer than I've known Trump. But I'd have to go with the boys at Mar-a-Lago"

"The boss at Mar-a-Lago."

Nigel Farage just said the quiet bit out loud.

Wolves really do have the opportunity to do THE FUNNIEST THING next week.

Oooof. That was a watch.

You’d never know she was the first pop act to perform at Coachella, twenty fucking years ago.

Feminists for ages: we are not just vaginas and baby making parts.

A trans woman enters the room.

Those same feminists: we are only vaginas and baby making parts.

Fucking clowns.

London Tube strikes dates revealed: What you need to know Tube drivers who are RMT members are set to strike in April, May and June over working hours.

If you're thinking of travelling in That London this week www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Having had a dog for a few weeks I can *kind of* understand now why so many of you talk about your children all the time. Like, all the time. A lot.

England fans facing hugely inflated prices to get to New Jersey's MetLife Stadium for World Cup games The cost of getting the train from New York to the venue, where the Three Lions play Panama in their final group game, will be £111 - nearly 12 times the usual fare.

Quite frankly anyone travelling to the US voluntarily gets no sympathy from me. They know what they are getting into.

news.sky.com/story/englan...

couldn't sleep. my body knows, deep down, that Tottenham Hotspur plays today

Why is the world just sitting around watching this shit happen? Under Trump, America is the corruption capital of the world

Trump comparing himself to Jesus while Vance tries to lecture the actual Pope on matters theological proves beyond any reasonable doubt that the ‘Christian’ element of their support is, morally & doctrinally, about as Christian as a hula hoop. Their conduct is literally unconscionable.

NIMBYS need hobbies. And evidently, a soul. Pass it on.