If customers piss me off I steal props off their plants. Victimless crime + my version of their plant will bloom more fruitfully because im nicest and sweets...

It really feels wrong to be going 30mph while listening to Tank! of SEATBELTS fame. I should be going at least 90 on the highway after having robbed a bank

Only people in there were me (harried, frazzled, begrudging) and the people in it for the love of the game (various housewares and knick knacks)

Michaels is open until 9 pm for the fiber crafters who play yarn chicken and lose

fucking hate when I go to the merch stand and I can’t tell if the person selling the stuff is in the band or not. I’m always like yeah I’ve been a fan of. you. or them. the band. for a long time. thank you I’ll take a mediun shirnt (drops my credit card and it rolls outside down into a sewer grate)

When my car reads a text out loud and asks if I want to reply & I say no and it goes "Ok then..." Like girl don't give me that. This isn't even about you. No need to be copping an attitude right now

A photo of a newer car's infotainment dashboard screen thing. Spotify is open on the screen and displaying a song by Angine de Poitrine, Sherpa. The runtime is at 2:54/5:43

No consistency at all man. Been driving around the parking lot in front of my work so I can listen to more of these funky little things

Yall are never gonna guess what broke my solid 7-month streak of literally only listening to jpop and I mean this genuinely only kind of as a bit

My tomatoes and peppers are still just babies but theyre growing so big and strong :') & my kale and broccoli are getting there! & i thought the last frost killed my eggplant but I just saw baby sprouts! I spent 2 hours playing around hauling dirt and planted shit in it and im gonna have food soon

I love gardening. When a hobby where nurturing and consistency and research and time and love are necessary to produce a result produces results that you can also eat >>>>>>

Scientists are still trying to figure out how one (1) little nighttime sippy of bedside water translates to six (6) gallons of piss

FUCK IT. I CANT LET THIS GO ON ANY LONGER. IF THE OSCARS CAN TIE, SO CAN THE FAR MORE PRESTIGIOUS PGOT NAYSH NAME OF THE SEASON. WHEN THESE TWO WIN WE ALL WIN!!!!

SEE YOU IN THE SUMMER SPACE (FIRSTNAME) COWBOYS (LASTNAME)

Referencing 67 and doing the gesture whenever possible in order to embarrass and enrage my friends in their early 20s is probably my second favorite part about being in my 30s so far. First favorite part is not being in my 20s

seeing the new trailer for the thing where you get to see one of your guys show up and say his line will cure you

i am no longer experiencing symptoms bc he said fortissimo :) #hesaidfortissimo

YES!!! YES!!! HA HA HA !!! YES!!!!!

im crying dude

what if she likes being a girl
what if she likes girls

A little round yellow emoji guy blushing and looking down at his pointer fingers, which are poking each other, as you do. Little hearts fly around the emoji's head.

Anyway 31 today...working on my birthday for the first time in recent memory but its not too bad because all the regular people I clean for today really like me ^-^

This year I found myself really excited to be sharing my birthday with millions of other people. Its literally our day! Its a special holiday for a bunch of people! People who share a birthday are in a cool club together 🫶🫰✌️

Just found myself thinking "you know I kinda miss being on the line" and then got so so so scared. Not unless its the last job option on this horrible earth

Its National Beautiful Day Outside today folks :)

ITS THE 1ST DAY OF SPRING BABEY.........YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!!! PGOT NAYSH NAME OF THE SPRING 2026 BRACKET IS HERE

VOTING WILL BEGIN TOMORROW IM TIRED

CLICK HERE TO VIEW IT BIG STYLE-->drive.google.com/file/d/1gCPHFooCQ9Zefh3o...

These poor straight women are going around in this world operating under the delusion that Gojo Satoru would fuck them or be their boyfriend. Ma'am? Ma'am thats a bottom. That man had one gay breakup so bad he most likely began to embrace celibacy afterward. Did we watch the same show

Anyway if Costco ever stops selling the gigantic pack of zero sugar strawberry lemonade liquid ivs I will do what the ceo said he would when they wanted to charge more for the hot dog

I couldn't stop thinking about anime sensei characters and before I knew it I made this. I'm sure I'm forgetting/mischaracterized some characters.

@crunchyroll.com For the record, both me and my wife have canceled our subscriptions over this, as have the majority of the people I know who used to use and enjoy crunchyroll (back when y'all actually cared about the anime y'all put out) & we'll stay unsubscribed until the OOONA switch is rescinded

Crunchyroll is about to make #anime worse for EVERYONE YouTube video by Mother's Basement

@crunchyroll.com here's your backlash, you braindead corporate buffoons. Keep the subtitles as they are now, or lose more money (via loss of subscriptions) than the nominal amount you would save hiring out these trash ass subs. Embarrassing. youtube.com/shorts/ty_70...

Omg they could be brothers