ayyyy congrats!!!

horseshoe theory is real. leftists almost got kat abughazaleh elected into congress and now it comes out that her boyfriend owns infowars…

Being Butch Nitro

Oh maybe it was. I only remember Bulk Vanderhuge off the top of my head

Just don't call me late to Turbo Dinner (that's what I call my meals now)

I am switching my name to Butch Nitro

searching guitar center dot com for "cornbread." no results :(

Went to Turkey to get a hair transplant and the guy kept pretending to give me hair and pulling it away when I thought it was on my head

I accuse the Grateful Dead of miming during some of their hours-long improvised jams

Mavis Beacon Teaches You a Lesson From the Top Rope.

I've never gotten diarrhoea from Taco Bell, and I'm not sure where that ubiquitous reputation comes from besides just what the food looks like

They actually made a guy named Pete Hogshit our secretary of defense you can't make this up

The Montgolfier brothers invented the Hot air balloon. The Wright brothers invented the air plane. Imagine the flying apparatus the Baldwin brothers could invent. Brothers. # of brothers. Flying apparatus Montgolfier. 2. Hot air balloon Wright. 2. air plane Baldwin. 4. ?????????????

This one never did the same numbers but i love it

My buddy's got a cool drum kit and my other buddy sings a bit so we're halfway there. I'm only acting as manager, not a proper member of the group. I'm just looking forward to seeing my favorite band back together again!

I'm reforming The Beatles with none of the original members, plus some buddies of mine who owe me a favor

Q: Did you know that ovals and diamonds are sinister circles and squares, respectively, from the squished up dimension?

A: Yes, I did. That's true

Even as a child I recognized that there was something wrong about ovals. Disfigured circles with unclear motives

Beavis and the Butthead

Some stuff is the tea!

silverfish meat is high in protein actually

Magicians should tell you how they did all that wonderous shit up there

I'll be extra careful considering that this shirt receives many disarming compliments

aforementioned Frasier shirt, from Stu's personal wardrobe

You mean... this shirt? 😏

I can't be the only one who thinks Robin Williams would be great at improv if he were still with us

Magicians ought to keep their illusions to themselves. They know what they're doing is wrong

"Epic moments make for the most legendary memories.." -my next tattoo

This isn't the right time for anachronisms

I wanna get out of bed but I don't want to get out of bed

Laser Focuz and Beam Ball

Lane Danger

Suzi Slotz

We made our Bowlsonas ( @rinbcage.bsky.social , @animalstressdreams.bsky.social )

JOHN CAGE: *writes Johnny B Goode*