Wanna find heart shaped rocks and throw them at each other..affectionately.

Dogs are cool.

Pass it on.

normalize walking into the sea after the slightest inconvenience

I might decide to be a villain today, not sure yet.

it’s called “being cheeky” because you’re being a bit of an ass

His imperfections were her perfections.

Where is she?!

Right? Lol

Ok, I’ve had enough of today. I’d like a refund.

It’ll be here before you know it

Yes! And thank you 😂😂

😂🏆

I'm always super careful with my whispers, actually.

We all deserve donuts just because it's Monday

breathlessly waiting for the end helps it to arrive faster

gonna emoji you like it's an aol chatroom in the 90s

That'll tell you the why for what when how now

I’m at the age where any discomfort could be the end

i grew my account the old fashioned way: by being an idiot online

Nothing compares to you, except coffee.

Happy birthday to marijuana

Me, and my emotional support can of Beefaroni, just doing our best.

If no one told you today, nice tits

I’m good at keeping secrets mostly bc i don’t care

cut my life into pieces please and thank you

My soulmate is out there finishing fries that could’ve been shared with me

I miss having a life. Kidding! Let's jump off a cliff.

squirt is stored in the balls

i’m a cowboy on a steel horse i ride, your honor

Monday Stabbies > Sunday Scaries